Advice is a strange thing. Sometimes you want it, need it even, and sometimes you don’t. I have always been very careful not to give advice unless it is asked for because I don’t like it when, in the middle of a relaxed conversation with a friend or family member, the person says “You should ….” Yeah, I don’t like that word, ‘should’ either!
Yesterday and today I asked for advice and, because I asked for the advice, I gave it a big hug when it was given to me. My three chosen advisors (one a handyman, one an accountant and the other an entrepeuneur) gave me pragmatic, do-able advice and I wanted to hug them too but thought that might be presumptuous.
Everything seems to have changed so quickly. All the birds I accumulated to make our lives more cheerful in the face of Husband’s physical deterioration live here happily while Husband himself lives in the nursing lodge. And the cuckoo clock I bought him for Christmas chimes every half hour all by itself in the living room where Husband and I watched television – a room Son and I hardly go into now because we are each doing ‘our own thing’.
Tonight, at dusk, I stood outside and looked at one of Husband’s favourite trees. It stands old, stark and defiant in the front paddock and its leaves whisper in the wind. I remember the time hundreds of crows bombarded it with a noise like thunder and scared us all until they flew away again. I remember the time one of our dacshunds burrowed so far under this tree, chasing rabbits that, by the time she emerged her nose was all swollen. I remember too, that this was Husband’s mother’s favourite tree.
“I think that tree is dying,” said one of my advisors.
Does anyone have any advice?
jmgoyder 
If it’s not threatening your home or buildings, just leave it. Dead trees create homes for owls, parrots and lots of other appreciative birds.
Brilliant advice. I just tried to subscribe to your blog so I hope it worked!
Well, since you asked…
Take it down. You can wait until fall if it is still giving some shade, but you don’t want the limbs coming down on top of you or your animals (I have one that I admire, but won’t sit under for that very reason. Its day will come soon enough.) Now, once you have taken the old one down, have it cut for firewood so you can enjoy it one last time.
Then, immediately go out and buy a new nice sized tree to plant in its place! I have had to remove several trees in California, and here due to disease and age. It is always sad to remove a great old friend, but planting a new one makes up for it, and will one day it will be as grand.
“When is the best time to plant a tree? 20 years ago. When is the second best time to plant a tree? Today!” (Anonymous, I think.)
But actually, it would be best to wait until fall so you can avoid the stress of the heat and dry weather.
XO, ~ Lynda
PS: If it is riddled with termites then don’t bring it in until you are ready to lite the fire! I know somebody who made that mistake…
Thanks for all of that Lynda. I keep thinking you live just around the corner – weird!
That’s excellent advice
Julie, it suddenly occured to me that in a tree that large there will be wood that is not badly damaged. If an arborist advises you to bring it down, then perhaps you might find a craftsman to make something out of some of the wood as a remembrance for you and your family.
~ Lynda
Spelling! occurred
There are no take backs in posting a comment in the blogosphere. ~ L
I didn’t even notice!
I didn’t even notice!
I had someone look at it and he said it would be okay for a few more years – yippee!!!!! When the time comes, your idea is the best ever – thank you!
I agree! YIPPEE! ~ L
HEHEE!
I do not have any advice, I’m afraid. But I would like to offer a big,virtual hug!
Reciprocated!
That’s a really tough one. No buildings nearby but I see cows. What could happen if it fell? Trees are part of our lives and those of our ancestors.
We live beside an offshoot of the canal du Midi (the canal de la Robine) in France. There is a highly contagious cancer killing the Plane trees that line either side of the canals. They have been providing shade and defining the landscape for three centuries. They now will have to be cut down and replaced by a variety not susceptible to the disease. It breaks our hearts as we will not live to see them grow and reform this beautiful landscape. But think about those that planted them all those years ago – they were thinking ahead in a very fine way.
So, if you cannot save that beautiful tree, plant another for future generations.
Your plane tree story is terribly sad – three centuries, how tragic!
Hi,
I totally agree with Carol, as long as the tree is not going to fall and damage anything, it is best left alone to do it’s thing. 🙂
So if it falls on top of me I will blame you and Carol – just kidding!
We waited too long to save our tree–a crabtree filled with blooms each spring–and now it’s too late. Don’t wait. Call an expert. If it’s already too late, you’ll know that too.
Oh now I am confused – hehe – food for thought and thank you!
I would be inclined to leave it too (unless threatening any structures or lives), but on the other hand if it REALLY is dying (at that enormous height), it might be safer to get an arborist in to advise you if it should be felled.
(Just trying to think of which well known mountain climber travelled safely everywhere and then got knocked unconscious by a tree in his own back yard).
Thanks but, to a more pressing matter, is your computer fixed?
Funny – today would have been my mother’s 94th birthday. She died last July, and I took her “home” for burial in October.
Looking at your tree, I think about her, and remember – everything has a life span. Some trees, like the camphor, grow very quickly, but live for fewer years. Others, like oaks, grow slowly, and can easily reach a hundred years.
I have no advice for you regarding your tree, but perhaps that bit of comfort – if it is old (as it must be) and seems to be going slowly, it may simply be that its time has come. Even now it’s beautiful!
Thank you for your beautiful words.
I agree leave the tree to its own devices and others. In observing Cockatoos on the ECU campus, they use dead trees for what I call their “beak work”, they chew the dead wood to keep their beaks in good working order. In particular on Sunday mornings they always seem to have a leisurely “beak work” session. So as Carol says, trees keep on giving no matter what age they are.
There is a beautiful childrens book called “The Giving Tree” which follows the progress of a boy into manhood and a tree throughout its lifecycle. The Giving Tree is there for the boy when he is young and can climb the tree, the boy carves a heart in the tree for his first love, the tree gives the boy her branches and trunk so he may sell them to buy a house and in his old age the boy returns to the tree and she gives him her stump to sit on. Maybe your tree is a “Giving Tree.”
(P.S. Julie please help me with the apostrophe and childrens book – did I need one? My reason for not using one was because I used the word children as an adjective. Unfortunately I no longer have my dad to help me with editing my work, he was the best editor in the world ……*sigh*)
You are so funny! It should be children’s – hehe – unless someone advises differently!
Thanks for your fantastic comment – I miss your smiling face!
Carol’s advice sounds good to me. I hope it surprises all of you, though. These seems to be so much symbolism here.
I agree with your agreeing!
I think it would be wise to seek professional advice … it’s all very well for everyone to put in their “two bob’s worth” but trees are an emotive issue and at the day you need to do what is practical. If there was a severe storm and Goosey Lucy and or any of the entourage (not to mention people) were injured you would not for give yourself.
the advice from Pixilated2 is sound and you can always start the tradition for the next century by planting a meaningful and memorable tree.
Pixilated2 is very wise! Thanks for your advice about the advice – haha!
Let the tree decide.
Best advice so far!
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If it were not for the fact that one of your precious animals might be hurt, I would say leave it. It’s sad when a beautiful tree dies, but it is worse if a little helpless animal were hurt by a falling limb. Since we no longer have farm animals or outside dogs, I let the trees that will not affect the house stay in place for the birds and anything else to utilize. Just yesterday when I was walking around our yard I notice one of the trees that had died now looked like Swiss cheese. I’ve seen a large red headed woodpecker flying around our yard and I would bet that is his handiwork. Nature has a way of recycling itself – something dies and becomes food for something else. You can utilize it for the fireplace or wood stove as well as for the occasional campfire.
I understand the tree evokes memories of better times when your hubby was well, but think about this. If you cut the tree down, you are not getting rid of all those wonderful memories – nothing can do that. Those memories will always be with you in you mind and in your heart. Planting a tree in its place, perhaps something that has berries to attract birds, will bring new life and hope to those that need it most. It is hard to let go, but as I said before, you have your memories and no one can take that from you. Best of luck, I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
Lovely comment and advice – thank you very much!
Accept the change; do what has to be done; move on.
Okay – if you say so! Thanks Tilly.