I’m not keeping up with the garden. Okay, it’s never been one of those beautifully manicured gardens anyway but over the years Husband has invested a lot of time and care into his roses, camellias, frangipanis, Silver birches, palm trees and so on. That was his ‘thing’, not mine and, as I was working at the university, I didn’t take an interest. Okay so it’s 18 months since I stopped teaching so I could be around for Husband as his Parkinson’s got worse, and anyone else would have noticed that the garden wasn’t getting its usual attention but not me.
You see I don’t just dislike gardening, I loathe gardening. I realise this is a risky statement to make because some of the people following this blog love gardening the way Husband does/did. And just because I loathe gardening, this doesn’t mean I loathe gardens; I love gardens but why can’t they just look after themselves?
We don’t have any proper reticulation so Husband used to spend the entire day watering the millions of flowers and trees and come in exhausted. Since Husband went into the nursing lodge, Son has been doing much of that but now that he’s incapacitated too, it’s down to me – argh! Sorry, but I can think of better things to do and have half decided to let nature take its course. In other words, anything that can survive on its own can stay – so far this is fig trees, palms, gum trees, wattles, camellias, pear trees, orange trees and a whole lot of other stuff.
It’s five acres – I can’t do everything. Even the bird bath has a crack in it.
Yeah, I reckon gardening is for the birds!
jmgoyder 
Same! I love the vege garden and the fruit trees and the roses that Husband cultivates but when he goes away and relies on me watering them for him – oh dear… it’s never a good outcome. I have really good intentions… actually that’s not true, I don’t think my intentions are that good, but I do wish they were. I’m with you on the whole natural selection thing, what will want to survive will make sure it does, although it might be a good idea to ask your hubby if there is a particular plant/tree that he is especially fond of or has some kind of affinity with – I wouldn’t like to see you have to explain the demise of that one! 🙂
Trouble is he has an affinity with all of them – I feel like such a failure!
I do love gardening, but it gets to be way too much as you’ve pointed out. I admire your courage to let it go natural. Ive been pulling out plants for the last few years with the goal of…if it’s not growing, I won’t have to trim, and water it. Those Ssian rock gardens are starting to look very appealing to me..
Not sure if it’s my courage or my laziness!
both work for me
ok
5 acres is too much even for someone like me who adores to garden. Its a full time job plus over time. And Jules you have your hands full and then some as it is.
You did not say, is it bothering husband?
If so than I understand you being so bummed. Yet you can only do so much, be so many places in a day.
But if he is able to see it as a garden past its prime -than maybe you could not beat up on yourself so, yes?
Is it a feasible think to see of your national Parkinson’s association would send some volunteers to help out with weeding and such? Such as:
Click to access international-parkinsons-support-groups.pdf
I suggest his only as worth checking out. I have been stunned to find the most incredible ways organizations may be able to help. When my mom was ill dying from lung cancer the American cancer society donated an air conditioner and even sent a volunteer to install it.
The worst thing they could say is no, they cannot help in that way.
Thanks, Baroness, for your wise words. Lost emus today so am a bit ‘over’ the gardening thing – Husband home for 3rd night, Son annoyed etc.
…and mom/wife overwhelmed. Certainly not a good day.
Some days the idea of being alone is preferred. Only the idea, not the real thing.
Goats are cool especially if you care not one iota about the garden. I once put in a $100 worth of spring bulbs in our front garden where the goats never visited. It was going to be my formal garden of or 3.5 acres, the rest left as natural when we bought it.
We left for a weekend, the goats tethered to their pen area… came on Sunday to the fact that the goats escaped, and dug up and ate every bulb I planed.
Needless to say I suppose, this was our goats last antic on our property. We (I) soon found them both a new home with who were [once ]our friends.
Your goats sound like our pigs (the ones we used to have).
It is important to acknowledge that you can’t do everything, and to let things go. And even more important that you don’t feel guilty about it, because that’s pointless and will sap your energy.
Thanks Tilly – difficult not to feel guilty but I will try! Juliexx
Five acres is an estate not a garden! No wonder you look on it and despair. Let it go and pick the fruit with gratitude for nature’s bounty. (Get some goats, they’ll keep it down.)
Goats? Don’t tempt me. Thanks for your encouraging remarks!
You could fix that right up in Photoshop! lol
Not a bad idea!