wings and things

Telephone traumas

on April 3, 2014

Over the last six months it has become increasingly difficult getting hold of Anthony on the phone. He has one of those big mobile(cell) phones with big digits but he is now too confused to answer it. When it rings, he either doesn’t realize it’s a phone or else he presses the wrong button and ‘hangs’ up immediately. Until recently I was able to reach him around three times a day if I kept ringing (especially on days I couldn’t get into town to see him) but now I am lucky to reach him once per day.

So, at the suggestion of a couple of nephews, today I cancelled his mobile(cell) phone account and spent an hour on the phone to Telstra to set up a landline to his room. I had already bought an old-fashioned handset with enormous numbers on it and tomorrow a technician is coming to the nursing home to get the line working. Poor Anthony is (hopefully temporarily) confused about what is going on as I did all this Telstra business on the phone from his room in the nursing home.

It would be so wonderful if he is able to manage answering this new phone because then all the people wanting to ring him would be able to cheer him up. The disadvantage, of course, is that if he is sitting outside in the sunshine (often) he won’t be able to answer it, but, with winter coming, he is more likely to be in his room anyway.

Fingers crossed!

40 responses to “Telephone traumas

  1. always trying to find a better way–hope this works

  2. Good luck with Telstra, India’s biggest communicator! (Or is that not pc?)

  3. I hope he will answer for you.
    Winter is still 3 months away here. is it earlier over there?
    (Only joking) šŸ™‚

  4. Anonymous says:

    Have my fingers crossed too.

  5. FlaHam says:

    Julie, This sounds like a great solution, and I truly hope it works out for all concerned. The larger phone with the big digits for dialing, should make it considerable easier for Ants. Take care, Bill

  6. He won’t be able to answer if he’s outside – that’s how it used to be, right? This is a conversation I often have with best friend, in fact when I go on my power walks now, I intentionally don’t bring my phone! And I’m loving it.
    Diana xo

    • jmgoyder says:

      Mobile phone now cancelled so it has to be the landline – mostly so that relatives and friends can phone Anthony. I hope it works – he did answer last night – yay! Thanks Diana (as for me, I hate talking on the phone ha!)

  7. Judy says:

    Julie, I remember when my mother had these exact same phone difficulties. I want to offer a suggestion that might be hard to consider financially. I was very blessed to have found a wonderful “companion” for my mother. In some cases, perhaps there are volunteers or a person who would come and sit with Anthony for one or two hours a day. It might such a difference for my mother! The nursing staff cannot do what a companion does. My mother’s companion stimulated her with conversation and they would enjoy looking at old pictures together. She would help my mom make phone calls to family members she seldom spoke with. I always knew that I could call her companion while she was with my mother; that allowed for an upbeat conversation, instead of a confused one. As my mother’s dementia worsened, it was her companion that reasssured her and it relieved me of more than you can imagine. Every penny that was spent (my brother’s shared the cost with me) allowed me to live with less stress and worry. Just something you might want to consider.

    • jmgoyder says:

      Thank you so much for this suggestion, Judy. It is something I have considered before so now I have my thinking cap on! xxx

      • Judy says:

        Trust me – I didn’t like the idea when it first was told to me. But it was a GODSEND! Every minute that my mom had that special attention made an incredible difference to my own life (as well as my mom’s). It will give you the well deserved peace you need to live your own life with less stress. Start off slow. Just get someone for even an hour a day. The first important part is to embrace the concept – the next part is finding that special person whom Anthony will mesh with. Just go for it! It will change your life.

      • jmgoyder says:

        Okay I have my thinking cap on – thanks Judy!

  8. Digits and paws crossed for you. It’d sure would help.

  9. viveka says:

    Julie, Iā€™m sure he will manage the phone ā€¦ I can get totally confused with my mobile too .. and press the wrong button. And neither can I find it when it rings. So I have all faith in the standard landline phone. Great idea.

  10. mrs fringe says:

    Great thinking, Julie. I hope this helps ā¤

  11. ksbeth says:

    my mother came to this point after a while. the landline worked for a while and then it moved to us calling and the staff bringing her to their phone when we called. i think the key is to just make changes as needed as things progress and try to let go of what worked in the past and accept what works in the present.

  12. Trisha says:

    I hope it works out. It must be so frustrating to not be able to reach him.

  13. My Heartsong says:

    I remember going through this with my Mom. When the small walkmans came out,forget it, she just couldn’t figure them out.She needed an old fashioned radio with big knobs and headphones so she wouldn’t disturb her roomate.She couldn’t always reach her phone in time which was beside her bed. When I would ring her I would let it ring until the answering machine would kick in-then I would hang up and call her right back. It often gave her enough time to get to it.It was worrisome just the same.

  14. janeslog says:

    Mobile phones are confusing for everyone! Do you not get PAYG mobiles in Australia. The supermarkets like ASDA, Tesco and Sainsbury’s all have mobile networks in the UK and the calls are very cheap ie 8 pence a minute to make a call.

    Perhaps he could have a spare PAYG phone as well.

  15. K. A. Brace says:

    Jules my wry New York sense of humor just makes me want to say maybe Ants just doesn’t want to talk to anyone–you know I’m kidding but one never knows–he sounds like he was a sly old fox at one time. Best>KB

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