jmgoyder

wings and things

The end of winter

Here in Australia we are two days away from spring after a very wet winter. Monday is the first day of spring and I am going to celebrate but I’m not sure how yet. Perhaps I will buy another camellia tree like this one from which I take flowers in to Anthony every second day.

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The other day I gave one each to the two women I play cards with during my volunteering hours. Gift-giving rules are very strict at the nursing home but I figure flowers can’t do anyone any harm, although Nat would prefer the chilli-garlic olives I used to bring in until reprimanded (risk of choking etc.)

Ming and Fran 2
Ming and Fran

And here is Ming with his little second-hand car, ‘Fran’. He has named her ‘Fran’ after the character in the comedy series Black Books, one of our favourites. As it happens, I am about to take this series into the nursing home to play on Anthony’s new DVD player. I took The IT Crowd in a couple of weeks ago and, even though Anthony slept through some of the two episodes I played, he woke up with a bit of a smile every time I guffawed, which was often.

The strange phenomenon in which Anthony sometimes thinks that what is happening on the television screen is happening in his room comes and goes. I only discovered this by accident one evening months ago when I rang him and he asked me to pick him up from Burekup (a nearby town) from an Aboriginal ceremony. At first I thought this was him hallucinating (a Parkinson’s disease symptom) but then I heard the background noise of his television which turned out to be a documentary about an Aboriginal ceremony; I could even hear the chanting! Now that we are watching Midsomer Murders every weekday afternoon from 3.30 – 5pm (another one of Anthony’s favourites, mainly because of the English countryside, the classic cars and the big old houses – not the murders), I sometimes worry that he will get scared. But seeing as this is probably the most benign ever of murder shows, it never happens and anyway he can no longer follow plots. I have gotten into the habit of checking the television guide before I leave every night and leaving the television on a channel that isn’t going to be showing a horror movie, or something like that. Ironically, this is usually the ABC news station.

Well, I better get going!

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Anthony is coming home for the day.

My husband, Anthony, is coming home for the day. I will pick him up from the nursing lodge in about two hours and bring him back to the farm. He is determined to help us do some jobs around the place, to relight the Aga and to get a fire going in the fireplace. These jobs will take until lunchtime and I am going to make one of his simple favourites – scrambled egg with chopped tomato. After lunch I predict he will have one of those weird ‘turns’ he has at noon but this time I will not panic or get the ambulance – I will just wait it out and let him sleep for awhile, even though it isn’t really sleeping; it’s more of a going almost unconscious thing which one doctor describes as a ‘brain freeze’ typical of Anthony’s type of Parkinson’s Disease.

Then we will probably all watch something funny on television (Anthony’s favourite series is Black Books), have afternoon tea while I show him the blog, then I will take him back before 5.30pm when dinner is served at the nursing lodge. By this time (I know from experience) Anthony will be very crippled and it will take both Son and me to get him to the car and Son’s patience will have run out. He is a wonderful teenager but, having shared the care of Anthony over the years previous to admission to the nursing lodge, Son has had enough and I completely understand this, so I will not make him accompany us on the drive back.

On return to the nursing lodge I may have to fetch a wheelchair. We will be greeted by the beautiful, friendly staff and I will settle Anthony back into his room, stay for awhile and try to jolly him out of his sadness at not being able to stay the night at home. Then I will leave and try very hard not to cry on the way home again. Once back at the farm I will feed the birds and put them away for the night, then I will go into the house where Son will give me a bearhug.

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