wings and things

Self-pity is not a crime

I am not just talking about my own self-pity – I am talking about anybody’s/everybody’s. Self-pity is a normal emotional response to horrible events, situations and dilemmas and, as such, it deserves respect, not criticism, advice or platitudes.

I reckon that if you feel sorry for yourself, go for it. Self-pity isn’t a crime and is probably a necessary emotion preceding acceptance, ‘moving on’ or whatever the psychologists call it.

But for many of us, there is no moving on; the grief is static, unending and ever-present because there IS no hope of improvement, of resurrecting the life of a child lost to illness or accident, of rewriting history.

If it weren’t for self-pity, I don’t think empathy would be possible because how can you possibly understand what someone else is feeling unless you have felt it yourself?

Self-pity is not a crime.