Yesterday afternoon Ming and I arrived at my mother’s place for our annual family Christmas get-together, having been picked up by my sister-in-law and her twins who wanted to see Gutsy9. The house was buzzing with kids, adults, food preparation, champagne and my mother’s incredible efforts to make it a perfect event. We were missing a few people: my other sister-in-law who is in the Solomon’s, my eldest niece and her fiance, in Scotland, and a nephew who was needed elsewhere, but we were still a crowd. One nephew is married so his beautiful wife was there, and another nephew brought his girlfriend who nobody had met before. Then Anthony arrived in the wheelchair taxi so we numbered 17 in a relatively small house. And it was very, very hot.
The meal was magnificent – turkey, cranberry, ham, salads, beets, chicken, roast potatoes, broccoli etc. Some ate inside in the airconditioning and some of us ate outside on the patio. As Ants was in a wheelchair it was easier to stay outside. He’d arrived at 5.30pm and I’d ordered the taxi to pick him up at 7.30pm but by 6.30pm he was beginning to falter so I got Ming to ring the taxi to come at 7pm. But when it arrived Anthony had picked up a little so my emotions mangled up and I could feel the tears coming as I began to wheel him towards the driveway down to the road. One of my brothers instantly took over and wheeled Ants down while my other brother hugged me as I sobbed. Thankfully most of the family were inside eating and didn’t witness this little drama but my three little nieces ran out to say goodbye to Ants as he was hoisted into the taxi. They put their arms around me and held my hands as I tried to stop crying.
I did stop of course, with a rather impatient taxi driver reminding us that we needed to pay the fare so the search for my wallet and money shocked my tears away for a bit. Once that was done, I kissed Ants goodbye and waved him off, my eyes filling with tears again. The nieces went back into the house and my brother got me a beer and I sat outside on the patio with him, trying to normalize myself. A little later my mother came out by which time I was okay again and feeling a bit silly for my heartsleeve behaviour.
But I did it! I got Ants there and he saw the throng of family that love him so much and he had a good time surrounded by the buzz. I don’t think I have ever felt so grateful for my family as I did last night. My mother and my brothers are legends, the partners and children are magic, and, when I rang Anthony this morning, he was happy and remembered the evening.
jmgoyder 
Oh, I’ve been waiting for this post since you posted yesterday. So happy it went so well. You have a wonderful family. I bet you feel like all the weight isn’t on your shoulders–well, at least for one day.
It was wonderful! Well apart from my stupid tears!
had a few tears reading this – how lovely your family is 🙂
The best.
that is such a beautiful scene you described. i am so glad Ants woke up this morning still remembering the events. you are a woman who shines among the shadows. don’t feel bad because the tears fall, feel glad because you can feel
That’s a good point about being able to feel.
you are a wonderful and beautiful woman, wife, mother and friend
Wow – thank you!
truth, truth only comes from my lips
Happy to know that you have wonderful family support and that Ants had a good time.
Yes it was pretty good in the end.
I understand the tears, it is hard to be all things to all people and to try to anticipate everyone’s needs and when there is a change that catches you unawares, the tears come from I think is emotional exhaustion. And then suddenly you are okay again, all that was needed was an emotional release. I find it heartwarming that the whole family supports you and I’m so glad for it.
My family is so great and everyone adores Ants which means such a lot, especially now.
I’m so glad, you were in the moment! Tears are not bad things, it was great that your family surrounded you with love.
I wish I had better control of those tears – they just spring up out of nowhere!
join the party pal…:)
Even though you were under a lot of emotional stress….it’s good to know that the next day your husband remembered and it was a happy memory…Diane
I am glad Ants has remembered it too – sometimes he doesn’t.
That’s what family should be for. How nice that they were there for you!
Brilliant family.
Our family is absolutely dependent on you, beloved daughter, and when you turn up to these occasions, everything and everyone comes alive. Having our so-loved Anthony there among us was pivotal to the celebration, and the agony something we all wanted to share with you. Seeing your brother holding you in his big arms, while the other one took
over wheeling Anthony to the taxi, will stay in my memory bank forever. Mother. x
I’ll never forget it.
And I’m sure that brilliant family thinks you are equally brilliant and have been there for them when they needed you 🙂
Thank you!
You have a beautiful mother Julie. I am so overwhelmed with emotion right now I can hardly see the keys on my keyboard. I have been praying for you and your family that God could give you more time together. Remembering time together. I must say this is the season for answered prayers.
You are a beautiful friend to say this – thank you!
how much easier with your family there to support you and anthony! elated to read of your joy and the family memory created in those moments.
I am elated too – more now than I was yesterday – feel very fortunate.
Julie, you are blessed with a wonderful family. I’m glad everyone had such a good time for Christmas, even with a few tears.
My ma is a star!
🙂 ❤
Yeeha!
I just….knew….it would work out just fine.
And the best part is that Anthony remembered it all this morning – miraculous and truly unforgettable. How wonderful to have a Mother & family who are so thoughtful and caring.
Glad everything worked out.
Vicki
xox
Yes and yes and yes!
So very glad that your day went well, Julie, and the BEST part is that Anthony remembered everything the next morning and was happy. I’m so very happy for YOU, and bless your wonderful family, too….
Thank you!!! Yes it was better than I expected.
Christmas is an emotional time anyway so give yourself a break 🙂
I can’t get a break until Ming gets his driver’s licence so I have resigned myself to that and it’s fine but oh how much I just want to get away from everything – argh!
what a roller coaster ride–but you got off safe and sound
good family is the best
My family embraces Ants and most of his own family do too – phew!
Now I know where you got your beautiful heart — it is a reflection of the love you and your family share. It is a reflection of the thoughtfulness, kindness, caring ways of those you love, and who love you.
So thankful to hear the day went well. So thankful you were surrounded by so much love. Blessings my friend — you are amazing.
You just reminded me of something. My dad died when he was in his late 50s – my brothers and I were still teens. My dad!
Family is the best! Glad you had the family around. I find isolation easier to deal with than loving arms…I suspect that is what happened to you yesterday. But it is good to weep.
I know! As soon as anyone hugs me I disintegrate but my brother’s arms are something I will never forget.
Merry Christmas Julie! Family isn’t easy and they come with their share of quirks and oddities at times but they are always there for us and are a great source of strength. They have no choice but to love us and I am grateful for my family too. I wish better days for you in 2013 my friend.
Thank you so much Diana!
You are allowed to have a cry because it is heartbreaking to have to send him back to the nursing lodge it may be were he needs to be but since you love him so much it hurts. Brothers can be awesome I have only one brother but he can be amazing when he isn’t annoying the hell out of me…………lol
Thanks Joanne!
A beautiful post, Julie and made me think of my own family with love. Did the twins love Gutsy9?
They loved him!
I knew it!
Julie, I am glad for you both that you were able to do this. xo, Lynda
So am I!
Your family sounds amazing! You’re very loved.
I’m lucky.
Blessings to you for them…
It sounds magical and I’m proud of you all! Goody and deserved. 🙂
Nothing holds a candle to a gathering of the clan – awesome!