jmgoyder

wings and things

A thank you to my family

on December 28, 2012

Yesterday afternoon Ming and I arrived at my mother’s place for our annual family Christmas get-together, having been picked up by my sister-in-law and her twins who wanted to see Gutsy9. The house was buzzing with kids, adults, food preparation, champagne and my mother’s incredible efforts to make it a perfect event. We were missing a few people: my other sister-in-law who is in the Solomon’s, my eldest niece and her fiance, in Scotland, and a nephew who was needed elsewhere, but we were still a crowd. One nephew is married so his beautiful wife was there, and another nephew brought his girlfriend who nobody had met before. Then Anthony arrived in the wheelchair taxi so we numbered 17 in a relatively small house. And it was very, very hot.

The meal was magnificent – turkey, cranberry, ham, salads, beets, chicken, roast potatoes, broccoli etc. Some ate inside in the airconditioning and some of us ate outside on the patio. As Ants was in a wheelchair it was easier to stay outside. He’d arrived at 5.30pm and I’d ordered the taxi to pick him up at 7.30pm but by 6.30pm he was beginning to falter so I got Ming to ring the taxi to come at 7pm. But when it arrived Anthony had picked up a little so my emotions mangled up and I could feel the tears coming as I began to wheel him towards the driveway down to the road. One of my brothers instantly took over and wheeled Ants down while my other brother hugged me as I sobbed. Thankfully most of the family were inside eating and didn’t witness this little drama but my three little nieces ran out to say goodbye to Ants as he was hoisted into the taxi. They put their arms around me and held my hands as I tried to stop crying.

I did stop of course, with a rather impatient taxi driver reminding us that we needed to pay the fare so the search for my wallet and money shocked my tears away for a bit. Once that was done, I kissed Ants goodbye and waved him off, my eyes filling with tears again. The nieces went back into the house and my brother got me a beer and I sat outside on the patio with him, trying to normalize myself. A little later my mother came out by which time I was okay again and feeling a bit silly for my heartsleeve behaviour.

But I did it! I got Ants there and he saw the throng of family that love him so much and he had a good time surrounded by the buzz. I don’t think I have ever felt so grateful for my family as I did last night. My mother and my brothers are legends, the partners and children are magic, and, when I rang Anthony this morning, he was happy and remembered the evening.


58 responses to “A thank you to my family

  1. Ms. Boice says:

    Oh, I’ve been waiting for this post since you posted yesterday. So happy it went so well. You have a wonderful family. I bet you feel like all the weight isn’t on your shoulders–well, at least for one day.

  2. had a few tears reading this – how lovely your family is πŸ™‚

  3. terry1954 says:

    that is such a beautiful scene you described. i am so glad Ants woke up this morning still remembering the events. you are a woman who shines among the shadows. don’t feel bad because the tears fall, feel glad because you can feel

  4. Northern Narratives says:

    Happy to know that you have wonderful family support and that Ants had a good time.

  5. I understand the tears, it is hard to be all things to all people and to try to anticipate everyone’s needs and when there is a change that catches you unawares, the tears come from I think is emotional exhaustion. And then suddenly you are okay again, all that was needed was an emotional release. I find it heartwarming that the whole family supports you and I’m so glad for it.

  6. camsgranny says:

    I’m so glad, you were in the moment! Tears are not bad things, it was great that your family surrounded you with love.

  7. Even though you were under a lot of emotional stress….it’s good to know that the next day your husband remembered and it was a happy memory…Diane

  8. That’s what family should be for. How nice that they were there for you!

  9. meg lane says:

    Our family is absolutely dependent on you, beloved daughter, and when you turn up to these occasions, everything and everyone comes alive. Having our so-loved Anthony there among us was pivotal to the celebration, and the agony something we all wanted to share with you. Seeing your brother holding you in his big arms, while the other one took
    over wheeling Anthony to the taxi, will stay in my memory bank forever. Mother. x

  10. yellowlancer says:

    And I’m sure that brilliant family thinks you are equally brilliant and have been there for them when they needed you πŸ™‚

  11. You have a beautiful mother Julie. I am so overwhelmed with emotion right now I can hardly see the keys on my keyboard. I have been praying for you and your family that God could give you more time together. Remembering time together. I must say this is the season for answered prayers.

  12. sbcallahan says:

    how much easier with your family there to support you and anthony! elated to read of your joy and the family memory created in those moments.

  13. Julie, you are blessed with a wonderful family. I’m glad everyone had such a good time for Christmas, even with a few tears.

  14. dodsy says:

    πŸ™‚ ❀

  15. victoriaaphotography says:

    I just….knew….it would work out just fine.
    And the best part is that Anthony remembered it all this morning – miraculous and truly unforgettable. How wonderful to have a Mother & family who are so thoughtful and caring.

    Glad everything worked out.

    Vicki
    xox

  16. So very glad that your day went well, Julie, and the BEST part is that Anthony remembered everything the next morning and was happy. I’m so very happy for YOU, and bless your wonderful family, too….

  17. Christmas is an emotional time anyway so give yourself a break πŸ™‚

    • jmgoyder says:

      I can’t get a break until Ming gets his driver’s licence so I have resigned myself to that and it’s fine but oh how much I just want to get away from everything – argh!

  18. what a roller coaster ride–but you got off safe and sound
    good family is the best

  19. Louise G. says:

    Now I know where you got your beautiful heart — it is a reflection of the love you and your family share. It is a reflection of the thoughtfulness, kindness, caring ways of those you love, and who love you.

    So thankful to hear the day went well. So thankful you were surrounded by so much love. Blessings my friend — you are amazing.

  20. tersiaburger says:

    Family is the best! Glad you had the family around. I find isolation easier to deal with than loving arms…I suspect that is what happened to you yesterday. But it is good to weep.

  21. Merry Christmas Julie! Family isn’t easy and they come with their share of quirks and oddities at times but they are always there for us and are a great source of strength. They have no choice but to love us and I am grateful for my family too. I wish better days for you in 2013 my friend.

  22. You are allowed to have a cry because it is heartbreaking to have to send him back to the nursing lodge it may be were he needs to be but since you love him so much it hurts. Brothers can be awesome I have only one brother but he can be amazing when he isn’t annoying the hell out of me…………lol

  23. Susan says:

    A beautiful post, Julie and made me think of my own family with love. Did the twins love Gutsy9?

  24. Lynda says:

    Julie, I am glad for you both that you were able to do this. xo, Lynda

  25. Judith Post says:

    Your family sounds amazing! You’re very loved.

  26. eof737 says:

    Blessings to you for them…

  27. eof737 says:

    It sounds magical and I’m proud of you all! Goody and deserved. πŸ™‚

  28. Nothing holds a candle to a gathering of the clan – awesome!

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