wings and things

A single sentence solution for sulky teenagers 2

on March 9, 2013

pea 147
pea 146

Ming has now become the main breadwinner in this family. He’s been working part-time for over a year now as a dairyhand for the family whose farm adjoins ours. Then, as of a few weeks ago, he’s been working three mornings per week as a farmhand for a man who lives up the road. Altogether, this just about equates to full-time work and a full-time wage.
As a result, Ming gets a bit tired and grumpy sometimes and this morning he said, Ï don’t want to work for the other guy anymore!”

Here are the sentences that formed in my mind:

– How can you be so lazy?
– You should be grateful to have work when there’s so much unemployment!
– When I was your age I had three jobs!

But I didn’t say any of those things because I was suddenly struck with gratitude for the way Ming is transitioning from boy to man, so I said:

I am so proud of you, Ming.

His grimace turned into a grin!

[Note: The prequel to this published itself prematurely – sorry!]

59 responses to “A single sentence solution for sulky teenagers 2

  1. Anonymous says:

    That was a good response from you Julie

  2. Rhonda says:

    Love the photos. Love the story and you. Gonya Jules. You are right to be proud and more so for telling him. And don’t you hate when WP prematurely ejaculates? Oops. I meant prematurely publishes. See? This smart phone thought it knew what I was gonna say and stuck that word in there! Bet it isn’t feeling so smart right now! 🙂

  3. victoriaaphotography says:

    I got confused when I tried to open post no 1 & then it suddenly opened into No 2.

    Just wanted to say … replied to Ming’s sentence with the perfect reply. It’s so easy to criticise when young people are having a bad day, are grumpy, or such. But what they need to hear is something positive. It makes all the difference to hear a positive comment that they’re handling life, (with it’s ups & downs) well and you’re proud of them.

  4. bulldog says:

    Difficult not to say what went through your mind but glad it didn’t come out… he is making his own decisions now…

  5. Well, I learned something new today. And you are right whenever anyone is having a bad/grumpy day maybe what they need is just a bit of encouragment and something postive rather than a lecture.

  6. mimijk says:

    I have to tell you what you already know – he is one gorgeous boy with a beautifully expressive face (even when grumpy). I too am proud of you both (and I’ve never had the good fortune to meet you)..

  7. Excellent reply. It must have taken a lot of control not to say those first thoughts, but it was definitely the right thing to do. And, of course, you ARE proud of him. 🙂

  8. FacetsofLucy says:

    Wow, he’s a handsome young man, and so mature to accept the workload despite an occasional grumpiness. I confess to occasional grumpiness, too. Your response was dead-on right – you praised him and it showed respect and appreciation for him. His smile showed you fed whatever he craved at that moment. Love it.

  9. I have learned that lesson with my sons, though I must admit it does not come naturally

  10. cecilia says:

    he is indeed a man, you have done all the training, now you just have to cross your fingers and agree.. c

  11. He has your eyes and I see Anthony in the rest of his face.:) Thank goodness our children can’t hear our internal voices and only our external thought projections. Good for you, recognition for hard work beats pretty much anything else for anyone.

  12. Lynda says:

    You do make me smile!

  13. terry1954 says:

    I am proud of you that you didn’t say to him your thoughts!! Good post my friend

  14. mrs fringe says:

    Love your response, and the fact that he’s open enough to hear it speaks volumes about who he is, and your family. Handsome young man, by the way 🙂

  15. viveka says:

    Julie, you – did a great choice … in not saying anything. Great photos of him .. I would be grumpy too if somebody took my photo in the morning or anytime of the day. He is a really handsome young man – but I think he is so likeness Ant over the eyes and nose. You are proud of him, that I understand – have you told him ????

  16. janeslog says:

    He is doing work which is physically tiring so no wonder he gets tired.

  17. You’re a wise woman.

  18. dogdaz says:

    You are so wise. One must quiet those internal voices that will not encourage growth. He will remember the support from his Mom for his decisions vs the nagging.

  19. Judith Post says:

    It’s bumpy, but they find their way. And so do we:)

  20. FlaHam says:

    Julie, I didn’t read the prequeal yet so I don’t know if it was premature or not. But I do know kids grow up right before our eyes, and sometimes they mature faster than they or should. You have every right to be proud of Ming. And he will continue to give you reasons yet to be proud.Take care, Bill

  21. FlaHam says:

    Julie, That damn enter button will bite you everytime. Take care, Bill

  22. It’s been so long since I was a teenager that I had forgotten that teenagers could be sulky…

  23. Yeah better to tell him how proud of him you are to say anything else would only result in an argument and stress and maybe tears so nothing good

  24. Quick thinking on your end, and a great answer.

  25. Ah… the difference of a few little words.
    Good on both of you. 🙂
    I am so proud

  26. You are right to be proud. So many young men of his age are spending their wages on themselves.

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