wings and things

Wrong number

on February 17, 2014


I have been trying to find someone to shear the alpacas, Okami and Uluru, because I didn’t get around to organizing this in January. They are not overly woolly and seem to be pretty happy because there is lots of water and shade, but it is very hot and March might be even hotter.

So I got a mobile phone number from someone who knew someone who might know a shearer and yesterday I rang it (assuming I was ringing someone who lived nearby). This was how the phone conversation unfolded:

Shearer: Yeah?
Me: Oh hello, I was just wondering if you shear alpacas.
Shearer (not a shearer): Not me, mate, naah, but me neighbor might.
Me: Would it be okay if you asked him for me? I don’t live very far away.
Shearer (not a shearer): No worries, love. Bloody hot isn’t it!
Me: Yes, that’s what I’m worried about, you know for the alpacas.
Shearer (who I will now call Man): Bitches?
Me: Well, no, it’s two males actually.
Man: Yeah I’ll sort it for you, mate – where do ya live?
Me: Paradise Road – not far from Dardanup.
Man: Where the fxxxx is that?
Me: I thought you lived in Dardanup!
Man: I’m in Queensland, darling!
Me: Oh, I’m so sorry – I think I must have rung the wrong number.
Man: No problems, love, better than the telly!
Me: Well, thanks so much and sorry for bothering you like this.
Man: Best fun I’ve had for ages, mate!
Me (laughing): Good to meet you, whoever you are and thanks!

This would have to be the best ‘wrong number’ situation I have ever experienced!


61 responses to “Wrong number

  1. I adore good humored people! 🙂

  2. Well… I think you needed a good laugh !! Diane

  3. mimijk says:

    Your alpacas are GORGEOUS!

  4. shoreacres says:

    This is hilarious. I’ve had two such “wrong numbers” in my life – conversations that went on and on until we discovered we weren’t talking to the person we assumed was on the other end of the line. I’ve bookmarked your tale, and may combine it some day with mine. I’d completely forgotten about them, or how funny they were – so thanks for this!

    On another note, when I came back from my trip last fall, I had a rug I bought up in the Texas Panhandle. It’s made of llama wool – hand done from start to finish. There will be some pics from the weaver’s shop in my next blog entry, as a matter of fact. What a coincidence! (They work with alpacas, too.)

  5. cobbies69 says:

    Some wrong numbers can be very abusive,, I laughed at the thought… 😉

  6. My husband and I were just talking about our future plans. Ever since his retirement, we’ve been trying out various options for where to settle and live. We’ve definitively decided it must be the country;

    Right now I’m in the city, living my country dreams vicariously through your blog. Not only does the country have the scenery and the animals, but it’s got all those country characters you never meet in the city. Not for everyone, I know, but it sure is where my heart lies.

  7. hahaha that was a wonderful wrong number conversation! The Alpacas are beautiful as is your place it seems from the bits I see from your photos.
    I thank you for giving me a chuckle and beauty first post I read this morn…it is going to be a good day!

  8. hahah, you made his day!!! And, the face on that alpaca, fabulous.

    • jmgoyder says:

      Yeah, their facial expressions are hilarious. Okami (the white one) usually looks benevolent, whereas Uluru (the brown one) usually looks totally alarmed. I think this is the only photo I have of Uluru looking calm – so funny!

  9. Colline says:

    He definitely was friendly. At least you both had a good laugh 🙂

  10. ha! Reminds me how when we plot our lives and things go differently and much better than we hoped at times…must be a quote about that somewhere…
    Diana xo

  11. Judy says:

    Somehow, this post had me thinking that you are almost like a zookeeper! I’m so amazed at all the animals and personalities you deal with on a daily basis. Love the humor and the fun – can’t imagine the poop clean up, though. 🙂

  12. paulaacton says:

    I know this might seem a silly question but do you have a zoo or animal rescue near you? Was just thinking they might have a number, failing that what about the vets surely they know someone? Push comes to shove what about the local dog groomers? They would be used to clipping poodles etc maybe they could do it

    • jmgoyder says:

      It’s not a silly question at all, but shearing alpacas requires a lot of strength because they are tactile defensive so have to be kind of lassooed prone. Okami is always fine with it but Uluru hates it – and I hate watching how much he hates it. But it’s all over in about 20 minutes – wool gone, toenails clipped. I have found someone to do it now via the vet so all will be well.

  13. Rhonda says:

    hahaha….glad you brightened his day….but me thinks he needs to get out more! rofl

  14. ytaba36 says:

    I like how the Queenslanders call everyone “mate”. I wasn’t used to that. coming from Adelaide.

  15. FlaHam says:

    Julie, You act surprised! with your engaging personality, I am surprised the conversation didn’t go on for hours. Smiling, it always nice to meet and engage new folks. Have a great day Bill

  16. He might be the most helpful wrong number Ive ever heard of. Nice of him to play along!

  17. tootlepedal says:

    Alpacas simply ooze charm, sheared or not.

  18. ksbeth says:

    this is wonderful! what a good sport he was too )

  19. Now if all phone calls could go as well as that one lol. 😀

  20. Carrie Rubin says:

    Ha, one more reason for me not to answer the phone. 😉

  21. Vicki (from Victoria A Photography) says:


    (would have been even funnier if he’d said “I’ll be there in 10 minutes to give you a quote on the shearing”).

  22. Lynda says:

    They both look as though they find the situation over the phone hilarious! Glad the guy on the phone had a sense of humor, Julie. 😀

  23. jatwood4 says:

    What fun — much nicer than the common snarl!

  24. Maybe he was saying SURE with an accent, not shearer.

  25. Judith says:

    What a fun mis-encounter! Hope you get in touch with someone closer, but hope the conversation’s as much fun.

  26. Terry says:

    I got a good laugh out of this as I assume you did also!!! hugs

  27. I LOVE Australians! You are so friendly and so funny. My kind of people.

  28. Best wrong number exchange ever! You Aussies have a real way with conversation. It wouldn’t be half as fun or entertaining with a couple of American’s chatting!

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