wings and things

An apology to my hands

on March 19, 2014

I have always taken my hands for granted. Not only that, I didn’t like them and I often said so to my friends. I hated my short, stubby fingers, peeling fingernails, freckle-wrinkles. I even did the fake-fingernail thing for awhile, the expensive hand moisturizer-guaranteed-to-remove-freckles-and-age-spots thing. Was I crazy?

It is now two months since this weird disease attacked my hands and now my left foot. I have been back and forth to doctors and have been on steroids, antibiotics and, as of yesterday, anti-fungal and anti-histamine stuff. Pompholyx: interesting word and no definite cure.

How was I to know that a seemingly simple little finger-blister thing, that occurred two months ago, would turn into a recurring nightmare over and over and over again? I can’t do the dishes, open a window or anything else that requires my hands (thank God I can still type). My hands and one foot are bleeding, scabby, blistering, itchy and, therefore, useless!

So please, hands, I’m sorry if I insulted you. In retrospect, I realize you were beautiful, wonderful hands, so please come back so we can be a team again. I never knew how much I needed you until now.

61 responses to “An apology to my hands

  1. mimijk says:

    I hope your hands are back to normal soon Jules – this must be uncomfortable and painful and irritating as hell!

  2. Ouch! Do you have to wear cotton gloves?

  3. FlaHam says:

    Julie, I truly hope your hands accept your heartfelt apology, and make a rapid and complete recovery, bringing your foot with them. I know you have been miserable, and I feel your pain. Please take care and get better soon. Bill

  4. Suzy Blue says:

    Sorry it’s still bad. Hope the doctors figure out a good treatment soon x

  5. so sorry you are going through this–funny how we appreciate things more when we lose use of them for awhile

  6. A friend of mine recently had a hip relacement surgery and from her bed she posted on facebook how often she has taken her body for granted and has hated things about it. When she is able to get back to normal life, she swears she won’t take it for granted again!

    I hope your hands and feet heal up quickly!
    Diana xo

  7. Oh Julie I was hoping that they would have healed a little more by now…but so glad you have Ming to help when he can…. Diane

  8. ksbeth says:

    so sorry, hope they are feeling better soon, and even if it is chronic, that you can find a way to manage it )

  9. I hope your hands are reading this, Julie. It must be so distressing.

  10. Julie I am so sorry you are still going through this darn hand and foot disease! My sincerest apology to your hands too, maybe if we all apologize they will listen and accept!
    “Julies hands, yes you the right and left, and foot you listen too, we are all sincerely sorry if we have offended in anyway, anything, any form and we all ask forgiveness. Please blisters, pain and bleeding hands go away and let our lovely Jules have use of you in full capacity again! Thank you.

  11. susanpoozan says:

    You are so brave!

  12. I hope and pray to the universe that it doesn’t beome chronic. I am also hoping that your hands will forgive you and let you use them again. It s extraordinary how exceptionally well all of our body parts serve us everyday in silence and it isn’t until one of them starts to hurt that we realize how much they do and how much we need them. Hugs to you and your hands and one foot 🙂

  13. Judy says:

    I feel for you! And I very much relate because my own debilitating dry eye condition has such similarities. I also have been told it is for life and doctors are trying to help me, but I’ve gotten little relief. My take on all this (because I’ve also had other stress-related condtions before) is that our body exhibits our emotional pain. It is truly a curse! Life is hard enough and then a condition like this just torments us further. I wish I knew the answer as I try to figure it out in my own life. I do know my condition is better when I feel better emotionally. It’s just hard to do that when there is added discomfort! Hang in there, Julie – I pray for healing.

    • jmgoyder says:

      And I totally empathize with you my friend – nothing like a health infliction to give one an understanding of what it feels like to have something ongoing like your dry eye condition. You are such a star the way you cope. Re the link between emotional pain and health – yes, I agree.

  14. mrs fringe says:

    Ouch, I hope they heal soon, this has to be miserable. ❤

  15. lensgirl53 says:

    Julie, I have felt the very same way about my hands…never attractive slim and pretty….I call them pioneer woman’s hands….ugh…I so empathize, on all levels. xo…dale

  16. Lisa Rest says:

    Oh this is so agonizing. I wish I had an answer for you. I know it exists somewhere.

  17. Trisha says:

    How awful! I’m sorry you’re going through this. I don’t know anything about Pompholyx but it sounds absolutely dreadful. 😦

  18. tootlepedal says:

    You are beginning to make Job look like quite a lucky guy.

  19. Carrie Rubin says:

    Sorry to hear it. Hope you find relief soon. 😦

  20. So sorry you are still suffering with this awful condition. I send you thoughts of healing and a total recovery.

  21. Do hope you find something that gets on top of the condition soon. Is it easier in the cooler weather?

  22. My Heartsong says:

    Wish you recovery and healing. Hopefully you can find others who have had the condition and a
    solution as well.

  23. I can’t stop laughing at your opening line 🙂

  24. When my life unfolded I read somewhere that I should start a gratitude list. I did. I put all sorts of things on it like my family, and friends and my sanity (debatable), and living in a fair and democratic society (also debatable), and my good health and positive attitude. Never did I think of being grateful for my hands. You have made me think. Sometimes it is easy to get dragged down into a self-pity party. yet I have my mind, my soul and my hands…. Thanks for the reminder 🙂

  25. That is so odd. Hope it goes away soon. I am still missing notification of your blogs. I see every 3rd one posted. Sometimes they are bundled with other blog notifications, but not always. Hmm.

  26. You are the second one I have ever known to come down with Dyshidrosis. The first was the church organist, pianist, and choir director at the church I used to go to from 1983-1993. She was so depressed when she realized that she was going to have to give up the organ, piano, and even choir directing since touching the music to turn pages and holding a conducting baton wasn’t going to pass muster.

    She eventually recovered, and the doctors in Bryan and Houston blamed it on an allergy to house dust mites. Many years ago, when Wikipedia came to be, I entered source 4 on the Wikipedia page for Dyshidrosis (which was called Pompholyx at the time). Nickel is also attributed as a cause. Considering your locale and all your pets, house dust mites might be a cause.

    Read the Wikipedia page and sources if you haven’t already.

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