Me: Yesterday, Ming and Benita celebrated their second anniversary of meeting each other with a “beangagement” party.
Anthony: I thought you didn’t want to do these conversations anymore, Jules.
Me: I don’t really, but, Ants, it was magic! I just wanted to tell you and then I’ll leave you alone.
Anthony: It was your idea to leave me alone, not mine.
Me: So, their play on words – bean (the baby) + engaged – was pretty clever don’t you think?
Anthony: I might be dead, Jules, but I’m not thick. But, yes, it was clever.
Me: Lots of people couldn’t come due to covid, including Grandma and Benita’s only sister, but there was still a crowd of well-wishers.
Anthony: And an abundance of pizza?
Me: Was that your idea for your 75th, or mine?
Anthony: Ours.
Me: Good point. But, Ants, in amongst the joy, frivolity, Ming and Benita’s commitment to each other, and their soon-to-be baby, I felt/feel a bit lost inside my own heart.
Anthony: Why is that, Jules?
Me: It was such a great party, last night – you would have loved it!
Anthony: And?
Me: You weren’t there.
jmgoyder 
Anthony’s absence was so huge, it was a presence. He was there.
Congratulations to Ming and Benita and soon -to-be gramma.
He would have loved to be there
A very sad gap in the festivities.