wings and things


on February 15, 2012

This is Son in ICU (Intensive Care Unit). Since then he has been moved to a ward but is in a single room where he will stay for three days due to some infection risk or something. He is starving, having eaten nothing for over 48 hours but he can’t eat yet because he keeps vomiting from the morphine. I stayed for a few hours and he had a couple of visitors but after they left he started to cry and my maternal presence just made it worse so he asked me to go, so here I am back at the hotel hoping he has gone to sleep for the night, hoping that the nurses will adore him, hoping that we have done the right thing, hoping that tomorrow will come quickly and I can see him again.

I subscribe to a blog by a beautiful woman who had the same operation and her description below says it all:

I don’t think Son and I were quite prepared for this! So far, I have restrained myself from crying but I have made an appointment with my tears for exactly 8.15pm with a 15-minute limit, then I’ll watch another hotel movie….

47 responses to “Recovery

  1. Nadine says:

    Awww hope your feeling better soon Ming!!! Xo

  2. artfulanxiety says:

    Thinking of you guys. Hope recovery goes well, and your tears get everything you need to get out. Hang in there!

  3. Being swamped and worrying about myself is no excuse for not visiting here and noticing what’s going on with you and your family. I’m sorry. I’m wishing you all the best, and sending positive thoughts out into the universe for your son’s recovery to be as speedy as possible.

    I share your view about wanting us all to care about even the smallest creatures among us, so I understand your previous post where you worried about how the bird would get fed. I feel that way about my cat. 🙂

  4. Lee says:

    Wishing him a speedy recovery. Your Friend Lee

  5. magsx2 says:

    I had a read of the blog you were kind enough to put a link to, and you are so right, she has written that down beautifully, it’s good that you have found someone that has been through the same operation as your son has just had.
    My thoughts are with you both.

  6. Ingrid Rickersey says:

    Hang in there Julie … the first days will be the worst. I understand the worry and emotional pain -you would just take the discomfort from him to yourself if you could, just to see him 100% again. He’s young and strong and I wish him all the very best for a speedy recovery .

  7. It hurts to read your post, because I know exactly how you must be feeling. Give yourself the time to cry, it’s ok it’s healthy. You have to let out your emotions, it will make it easier for you to be stronger for your son ♥

  8. cuhome says:

    My heart is with you and Son.

  9. victoriaaphotography says:

    Im thinking of you too.

    I knew it would be hard to get through this early period after surgery. You want everything to magically ‘Fast Forward’. But Time rarely ‘Fast Forwards’.

    Please allow yourself to have a good cry at the hotel – if necessary, for hours.. It let’s go of a lot of tension and worry, then you’ll be able to cope better when you visit your Son.

    He is probably fed up with the tubes & neck brace etc already. Best way is to talk about your day and what movies you’ve seen (or whatever). Make the effort to go out to the shops or whatever. This reassures Son that you are coping and managing your own worries. It also reassures Son that you are not cooped up in a hotel room trying to ‘kill time’.

    Time is the greatest healer, but Time take a long while to pass at this early stage after Son’s surgery.

  10. So sorry your son must go through this. I’ll remember to pray for a quick recovery without complication. Best wishes to him and your family.

  11. Jennifer says:

    There’s absolutely nothing worse that one of your children being in pain and you feeling so helpless. It’s an all consuming wrench which literally makes your insides feel like they’ve been hollowed out. It’s terrible now, but day by day it will get better – the nurses will love him and care for him, the Doctors will be wonderful, your son will find the strength to recover much quicker than you think, and you will cope with the stresses day by day, because you’re a mum, and that’s what mums do. There’s no tougher bird than a mum with an eye to protecting her young against some foreign foe, no matter what form the foe comes in. Thinking of the three of you. XX

  12. yeah! i’m glad everything has turned out. i think your tears will be an expression of relief . . . like finally getting to exhale. cheers!

  13. bluebee says:

    You’ve both been through an awful lot and owe yourselves a jolly good cry.

  14. John Duzevich says:

    Hi Julie.
    This is the first blog I have ever replied to. I have been following your blog and only realized today I can reply!!!!!!
    I look forward to coming around when you are out of hospital. I am on long service leave for the first semester. I will find it very hard to go back to work.
    Hang in there
    Kind regards

  15. I am sorry and happy for you and your son. Sorry that you both are having to endure so much pain. Happy that in the end this will be a success. I believe nothing less.
    I so understand and can relate having a child in ICU. Our then 34 yr old daughter had a mini stroke, no full blown aneurism but bleeding on her brain that required emergency 9 hour brain surgery. She was then in an induced coma for 3 days to allow the swelling to minimize on her brain and so to keep her brain from more trauma.On the 3rd day in a coma the doctors started to reduce the sedation. She woke up the next day on Easter Sunday. This was almost two yrs ago, we will be celebrating 36th birthday this April and she has very few permanent deficits.

    We are truly blessed. As you, your husband and son are as well.

    This awful time of seeing your beloved boy in so much pain will pass. And when it does all that you both will recall are the special moments created by a very un-special time.
    Take care of yourself, be very kind to you. This is an important but gentle reminder that you must take of you to take care of him.

    God bless your family and bravo you for your courage to only live it fully but to share with others who benefit from your sharing.

    • jmgoyder says:

      Thank you very much for your lovely comment and I think your daughter is a hero!

      • Touche! As is your son who elected his surgery in a sense. I can only imagine the amazing courage and strength it has taken him to get to this point in his journey.
        Will you share something with him? Please tell him if he finds he is becoming discouraged, to remember it is not the destination. It is about the journey.

      • jmgoyder says:

        I certainly will share that with him – thank you Baroness!

  16. Tilly Bud says:

    You are both so brave. Here’s hoping he’s on the mend quickly.

  17. The nurse in me screams why aren’t they managing his nausea. Many people need medications to control nausea when they receive morphine and related opiates. I hope that by now, it’s not an issue, but if not, demand they do something!

  18. avian101 says:

    Dear Julie,

    I”ll say a prayer for your son’s prompt recovery.

  19. pattisj says:

    Thanks for your visit to my blog. I hope your son’s recovery is going well. My granddaughter was diagnosed with scoliosis, but physical therapy has helped her a lot. She, too, like the woman’s link you provided, said she felt taller. She is adjusting to walking in balance.

  20. dcwisdom says:

    Thanks for liking my blog.
    God bless you and Son. I am a former respiratory therapist who treated wonderful people like your son. The picture shows the great spirit in him, and as young as he is, there’s wonderful promise for him. Also, as a mom of a son with a physical challenge, I can certainly relate to your tears and yearnings for your beloved. As you are there in the moment, my prayers lift you up to the Lord, and I hope to encourage you as my dad encouraged me: And, this, too, shall pass. There’s hope, too, on the other side.

  21. Julie… hoping and praying that your son is making steady progress. My fusion surgery was a huge ordeal, and healing was slow – but I did heal. It’s still early days for your son now at just about a month out. My indication for surgery was different, but for scoliosis I have heard this can be a very successful solution. Keep me posted! Sending Hugs!! RL

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