I got home from my mother’s place this afternoon thinking I should have stayed another night despite the care package. Then I found that Ming hadn’t eaten much and was down in the dumps. Then I tried to ring Anthony (and am still trying), to tell him I’ll see him tomorrow. Then I discovered that there was no toilet paper.
Now I don’t think the lack of toilet paper usually sends people over the edge, but I experienced 15 minutes of crushing despair until I spotted a quirky gift on my bookcase – Novelty toilet paper!
I cried half of it away but the rest will be used for usual purposes! Now I just wish I could remember who gave this TP to me.
jmgoyder 
And while using that TP you could say (or yell) DESPAIR CAN KISS MY ARSE! 😉 I hope your day is better.
Brilliant!
when u feel like shit…. remember someone out there loves you ❤ ❤ ❤
Ha – okay!
No wonder Ming was in the dumps. Perhaps he also despaired over the lack of toilet paper!
Or the lack of food!
Gosh, you must feel stressed out being pulled in different directions by your family, but the lack of toilet paper, my goodness, now THAT is the ultimate stressor in life.
(My Mother used to say that the only thing she couldn’t do without were cups of tea and soft TOILET PAPER!).
But you could use tissues, newspaper (as my Mother did as a child) or even a cloth of some kind.
Hope your Mother is feeling much much better at home. The elderly do like the comfort of familiar surroundings.
I’ve just run out of tea too!
Julie, The simpliest of joys can sometimes be the most moving. But why does your TP seem to scream Kiss my butt ??? LOL LOL — please take care and have a great day. Bill
I am going shopping today!
“the usual purposes” – you made me smile 🙂
Well I didn’t want to be too explicit – ha!
Always make sure you have enough tea or coffee, milk and toilet paper.
Without enough of the above in the house I find I can’t function. Kitchen roll is a good substitute for toilet paper.
During long distance walks in remote areas of Scotland where there are no shops we use leaves if we run out of paper. Docken leaves are good but I don’t know if you get dockens in Australia.
You live in an area like I used to live in on the Isle of Arran. The village was Lochranza and there was a small shop there but they often run out of essentials, especially when the youth hostel opened and there were more customers in the summer.
We learned to improvise and I think this island living has helped me get through my life today. Learn to improvise and you will never be stuck.
At least your mother is okay.
Ah – leaves – good idea! I like the sound of that village.
Look up Lochranza on Google maps and streetview. It is a lovely village with an ancient castle on the north of the Island of Arran.
Lochranza Castle was used as the model for the castle in the Tintin adventure ‘The Black Island’, for the English translation in the 1960s when the drawings were modernised.
You would love the village as life is so simple.
As my daughter Alexis discovered yesterday, tears are simply the words the heart cannot express.
Good for you for crying. Your tears heal the broken places and give you space to begin again.
Love to you my dear friend. You inspire me.
I have been reading your daughter’s blog – she is inspiring too.
when you gotta go, you gotta go, is this where the phrase came from,,,,,,Kiss My Ass???? LOL as I look at the design on the paper and where it will be used I couldn’t help but laugh. so glad u found something to use, other wise you would have to choose a rough paper towel!
I don’t think this TP was meant to be used. It’s like sandpaper!
They should really sell your novelty toilet paper commercially, anyone who is down in the dumps would get a lift from lipstick stained toilet paper. You poor thing, you need a warm soothing bath with lavender and bubbles to ease away the sadness, stress and overall negative energy that is weighing you down. I found a store that has a wonderful website called Lush.com, it is all natural soaps, shampoos and everything that can help your skin and mood. They opened a store somewhere in Australia and I can guarantee that a good soak with a lavender bath whatever would do you a world of good. Ming can have his own bath afterwards. Hugs!!
Oh that sounds heavenly but we don’t have a bath!
Oh darn, well if you come across a bath tub, sneak a soak with lavender, you won’t regret it. 🙂
Good one! That’s my kinda gift and statement. 🙂
Haha!
sometimes that is all it takes – just that one more thing–glad you found your novelty tp–I keep a roll in a drawer in my room just in case–be kind to yourself
Good idea!
Great TP!
Hope you managed to speak to Anthony.
Yes, with the help of a nurse. He is forgetting how to use the phone.
A coupla cute comments above ;). So glad you were saved by toilet paper kisses!
It has the texture of cardboard – alas!
Oh no! I can only use one brand of toilet paper or I get injured, so I feel sorry for you!
Is there a message there? Kiss my ?Good that your Mother is at home again and all will turn out. I really like the tp, by the way.
Yes – the TP message is a little disturbing!
I find that my meltdowns are usually catalyzed by some small thing that to others might seem insignificant. I tend to let things build up and then…wah! I think I’m overdue but we just got a big supply of TP. Hope things ease up a bit for you, Julie. And enjoy the fun toilet paper!
I know – it’s the tiny things!
Who would have thought you’d one day write a story about ‘toilet paper’ … I realize there’s more to your post…but it is a milestone of some sort…Diane
Ha!
What a stressful time you’re having, Julie. Good job you got home when you did, by the sound of things. That toilet paper is too funny. 🙂
And now I’ve run out of milk – argh!
Lips on toilet paper? Hmm, just wrong. 🙂
Only if you think about it too much – hehe!
Just to clear things up, it wasn’t me.
Don’t worry – you were never a suspect!
Whoever gave it to you is one good ass kisser, Julie. haha. {{{Hugs}}} Kozo
Haha!
I think I’ve remembered who now!
so many of us can go through the really tough challenges and never break, what people don’t see is when we have no toilet paper! that is why i cringe when people say i am brave.
blessings to the person who gifted you the tp! they had no idea what a difference it would make:)
I like the look of the toilet paper it brought a smile to my face
I thought you might have decorated the roll yourself! LOL ~ sometimes the universe supplies us with remedies for our troubles… this might have been a little such gift! 🙂 Hope you are feeling better dearest Julie! ~ x RL
It’s always the little things that tip you over the edge – I once bawled my eyes out over £4.
I hope the cry helped.
Talking about kissing your ass, Julie …. very pretty … and a pretty can never be too much for your backside. *smile
A timely reminder that you are loved 🙂 I’ve got a roll with crosswords on it that I was given for my 21st! Clearly, someone thought I was a complete nerd. Or constipated… 😉
It is the straw that breaks the camels back. Be kind to yourself dear friend!!
You made me laugh! I hope you don’t mind… but really, you made me laugh!
I am so glad your friends foresight saved the day!
I trust things got better after that?
xo
TP Despair meets the perfect kiss off! Too funny!
I saw a place a few weeks ago that would put your pictures on toilet paper. Me? Nope. Zoey the Cool Cat? Nope. I think I’ll stick with everyday plain white.