jmgoyder

wings and things

Missing Ming

on September 15, 2015

Ming has met a beautiful girl and, as a result, I hardly ever see him, except fleetingly.

Of course I still hear him climb in the front window in the early hours (because I keep forgetting to have a second key cut, but I did remember today!)

And, occasionally we indulge in leisurely conversations during the five seconds he has left to get ready for work.

Me: Good morning, Ming! I shout from my bed.

Ming: Morning, Mum. What do you want? he shouts from the bathroom.

Me: Oh, darling, I don’t want anything! How’d the party go?

Ming: I don’t have time for this morning conversation thing, Mum. Can you just leave me alone so I can get ready for work!

Me: Okay, sorry.

It’s all a bit surreal for me. Of course I haven’t actually lost Ming, and I always knew that one day he would meet someone who would both challenge and embrace his opinions, personality, habits, originality.

The beautiful young woman with whom Ming is involved has a similar ‘old soul’ wisdom to his but is much more academic. Every time I meet her, I am impressed by her integrity, and honesty, and the way she looks at Ming.

So, yes, I miss Ming in the sense that I don’t see him as often as I used to. After all, why would he want to be home with me when he can be out and about?

Nevertheless, I always knew that one day I would be without Anthony here (already happened), and maybe without Ming here (happening).

Hence the birds:

IMG_4743

IMG_4746

I am so proud of this Ming of mine.


41 responses to “Missing Ming

  1. It comes to us all eventually 😦

  2. It’s hard to let your kids go into the world and find their own paths– even if that’s what they’re supposed to do– good luck!

  3. Colline says:

    You may miss him but he is ready for another step in his life – means you brought him up right 🙂

  4. ksbeth says:

    it is always bittersweet as the chicks move further from the roost, but also exciting and something to look forward to. life is fluid, as you know. nothing stands still.

  5. Vicki says:

    Very nice shot of the Peacock, Julie.

    I’m sure all the Mothers all over the world feel exactly what you’re feeling when their offspring spread their wings and leave the nest – sadness, apprehension, anxiety, pride, joy, happiness and sadness (did I say sadness twice 😀 ).

    It’s all so very normal and understandable, but it doesn’t make the change in your own life any easier.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    Time to plant some more seedlings I think.

    Sending some cyber hugs across the miles.
    Vicki x

  6. Anonymous says:

    Love you and your charisma. Love the things that you find strength to struggle through . Love the way you paint the world so raw, and then reflect upon it and make it so natural and vibrant and harmonious. Love the way you make language hang like dripping laundry re-consuming itself in the air and becoming shapely and formed and substantial. After all, said and done, we are in this topsy-turvy, politically derived narrative/conundrum together. Not so fond of you posting your thoughts on your nearest and dearest, strongest and youngest making his own choices in the world. Those surely have to be his world, right or wrong, beautifully or otherwise. My mother in her ‘wisdom’ said “Don’t get hurt”. My opinion – Life is about being scarred by good people.You..although you may not believe it, are one of those good people, brandishing your voice like a quavering clarion. Julie, you are amazing.

  7. Rhonda says:

    Yet another chapter Jules…one I’m sure you’ll capture as carefully, thoughtfully, lovingly, and honestly as you have all the others. It sounds like Ming has found a gal that will challenge him as well as being someone you admire. That’s half the battle. I look forward to tales of Ming and his beautiful bird as much as you and yours….much love my friend
    R

  8. Hugs dear Julie. I know that feeling. The sense of ‘loss’ that isn’t really a loss and the joy of our pride in our children growing into such beautiful, creative and inspiring adults. Job well done!

  9. I feel your emotions, which is why I have Jack, Lulu is my daughter’s but Jack is mine, he won’t move out when he feels it’s time. lol

  10. This growing up nonsense….is “for the birds” 😉

  11. Amy says:

    It is indeed hard when they start growing up and going their own direction. Love the birds!

  12. Trisha says:

    I’m not sure I’m going to handle it well when my baby boy (15 now) gets a new girl in his life. I know the day will come when he’ll be too busy for me too. 😦 I guess that’s one reason we surround ourselves with animals! I’m happy Ming has found someone though. I do hope that happens for both of my boys.

  13. Judy says:

    It’s so hard when those we love fly away – flying from us to explore life and flying from us because of death.

  14. susanpoozan says:

    You cope with it all admirably.

  15. Exciting and wonderful time for Ming…. and while every mother ‘loses’ a bit of her child when they begin a relationship we know that is just the way it is…. I guess because they aren’t a child anymore… so we gain I think joy in their growth and ‘spreading their wings’ so to speak…. not sure if that makes sense… but just my thoughts Diane

  16. tootlepedal says:

    I hope that the birds continue to look after you well.

  17. Terry says:

    I always hated my kids getting old enough where I had to think about the day they may move out

  18. Happy relationship-ing to Ming! NOW maybe you can pay attention to that Julie person. 🙂 It would make Ming AND Anthony happy to have you spoil yourself a bit. 😉

  19. i remember when my own son met his first true love. oh the wonder of it all! now we know what our own parents went through. what a wondrous time you are embarking on. what a dichotomy you are experiencing! if anyone is, you are up for the challenge.

  20. paulaacton says:

    Could this be the one that makes him understand the real value of those pretty trinkets he thought a waste of money not so long ago lol

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