I think I’ve mentioned this before, but Anthony often asks about his mother. He either asks me where she is or how she is. It’s a difficult question to answer because Anthony’s mother died over 30 years ago. Sometimes I just say that she is fine; other times, especially when Ants wants to visit her, I have to gently tell him the truth.
Me: Ants, she died a long time ago … remember?
Anthony: Sorry, Jules, I got stuck.
Me: It’s okay, Ants – it’s just the Parkinson’s disease affecting your memory. Don’t worry about it.
Anthony: Parkinson’s disease, yes.
Me: Do you remember your mother’s salmon mornay?
Anthony: Yes – beautiful.
Me: And how I couldn’t make it as well as she did?
Anthony: Yes you could!
Me: She is definitely one of my heroes.
When a son, who is nearly 80, remembers his mother with such incredible affection and concern, it makes me pause, look up at the sky …
and wonder
jmgoyder 
How beautiful Jules xxoo hugs
She was a larger-than-life person too!
😀
You are so patient with Anthony – and this is what your son sees. You are a good role model to him.
I hope so. It is all getting very hard for Ming.
So moving.
I was there today, madly ringing window cleaners with no luck (Ming is having a party on Saturday), At one point Ants said, “Why don’t you get the people Mum always gets?”
Makes me wonder.
And believe.
And adore the two of you.
He was brilliant today, quite vocal in a soft way. I always feel a sense of overwhelming relief to see him.
Unexpected and wonderful visits when he is right there isn’t it Julie? He keeps surprising us!! I wish he knew that so many people are so very touched by him and you, and your love.
Through the agony of this story, how can one not come away with a smile. Well done, Julie.
Thanks Frank – that means a lot.
And whisper “Thank You for raising such a wonderful man so that I may know this kind of love.”
Perfect!
The most precious memories are in tact until the end with Parkinson
You are so right, Terry – thank you xxx
It is so hard deciding how honest to be. My dad would ask to speak to his mom on the phone. At first I would say “but Daddy, remember Gran died?” He would cry and say “No! When did this happen? ” Eventually I just said that she was out… It is so horrible seeing the dreadful devistation of the disease. Lots of love my friend
I am so hoping Anthony won’t enter a phase where is anxious like this. Beautiful comment – thank you Tersia xxx
What a fine man he is, his mother would proud of him.
She certainly would!
I don’t think we ever forget our mother’s love. It is such a comfort and found nowhere else on earth. I have learned that in the subconscious, time doesn’t exist. Feelings can be summoned from childhood and feel as potent as when the memory was made. What I see from all of your posts – is how much love there is surrounding you and Anthony, between both of you and from both of your mothers. Such a beautiful love story!
I really loved his mother too.
It’s rare to have such a special relationship with your mother-in-law. I think of mine sometimes; we were close. She passed away before I divorced; I shudder to imagine how that might have affected her.
This brought tears to my eyes!
Oh sorry!
No, they were those sad/happy tears about how beautiful life can be. It’s just so touching to think of Anthony still thinking of his mother so much.
And how nice that he thinks that you cooked as well as she did.
Well it took me awhile to get it ‘right’!
He is a good man but you know that already
The ‘goodest’ man I know!
They must have had a wonderful connection.
Yes, quite rare and amazing.
“I got stuck.” Yes, stuck in the past. . . how apt to describe it in that way.
Julie, I remember your telling of your salmon mornay and your inability to make it. How wonderful that he remembers it as being good as mom’s. That is rare. ❤
Thanks, Lynda – the nostalgia is killing me haha!
i can imagine your ming having the same affection for his mother as an 80 year old man:) chris forgets things and asks me to remind him, then he says he concerned he has alzheimers or some sort of dementia. for some reason i am honored to be his memory and to share this part of his aging process with him.
you are an amazing mom and will be well remembered long after you are gone from this place.
What you write here is so profound, Sandra. I know we are at opposite ends of this weird coincidence but it rocks! I think of you and Chris all the time. It is such a privilege to know you!