Me: Hi Ants.
Anthony: Hi Jules.
Me: I’m so much better. I can’t believe it – it’s such a relief!
Anthony: That’s good, Jules.
Me: Is there any way you can put a bit more animation into your voice? I’m beginning to forget your voice, you know, the one you used to have before Parkinson’s disease.
Anthony: IS THIS BETTER?
Me: I think so but you sound really fake.
Anthony: I’ll try harder, okay?
Me: That would be great because I didn’t realise until today that I had forgotten how you used to speak. I know it was always loud and booming with enthusiasm but I can’t remember what you actually said before you got sick.
Anthony: Probably a lot of bullshit.
Me: No way! You could sometimes be quite profound actually, even after you got sick.
Anthony: That’s good, Jules.
Me: You’ve already said that.
[Anthony sighs]
Me: Sorry.
Anthony: You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about. How is the …?
Me: The son? Ming?
Anthony: That’s the one. Yes.
Me: He is amazing – a rock! He has this extraordinary ability to do empathy without getting down in the dumps himself. We are so lucky to have this incredible son, aren’t we!
[Anthony nods]
Me: Sometimes I hear his loud laugh on the phone with someone and it sounds exactly like you – exactly! It’s a bit disconcerting.
Anthony: That’s good, Jules.
Me: Oh, okay, you sound tired.
Anthony: That’s you, not me.
Me: I couldn’t wait to get home so I could talk to you like this, Ants! My psychologist will either be relieved or have me committed.
Anthony: You’ll be right, Jules.
Me: Okay, good night, Ants. I love you.
Anthony: ‘Night, Jules. Give me a kiss on my heavenly brow.
Me: OMG, it IS you!
Note to readers: I am not going mad – this is great fun, sort of.
jmgoyder 
These chats are brilliant. I wish I could think of a brilliant quote about humour. It is making all the difference as you begin your healing journey.
I am glad you are not going mad!
No not mad, just finding a way to cope
It’s good to find you here with your sense of humour still in tact.
How wonderful to hear from you!
*intact* 🤓
Aren’t we all a bit cuckoo at times in our lives. People who don’t have this ability to talk to themselves in this rational and calm way don’t know what they’re missing.
I think its a wonderful way to keep the memories of Anthony alive and flourishing. Besides, it, is, fun 😀
Yes and it’s still fun, although poignant too, and it’s probably stopping me from going cuckoo in a way ha!
Whatever works…is good.
Thanks so much! I was a bit nervous about writing like this.
You shouldn’t be nervous…it’s part of your process 🙂
These imagined chats are very therapeutic for all of us!