jmgoyder

wings and things

Dementia and Depression

The title of this post is a bit misleading (intentionally) because it implies that Depression is an off-shoot of Dementia and, yes, sometimes this is the case.

Anthony, who recently turned 81, has Parkinson’s Disease Dementia but, even after having been in the high-care section of a nursing home for five years, he is rarely depressed.

Julie (that’s me), who recently turned 58, has Depression in the clinical sense – i.e. she has a disease in much the same way that Anthony has a disease. But, like Anthony, she is rarely depressed. There is a rather wonderful irony here.

I am not quite sure why I wrote the above paragraph in the third person except for the fact that I have been so deeply embarrassed by my diagnosis for so many years now that I find it difficult to admit. Admitting it now is my way of combatting the stigma that still exists, and rejoicing in the fact that there are treatments; that I have been helped by these treatments (medicinal and psychological); and that I have become sensitive to others who suffer like I used to.

In recent weeks I have had the most ghastly outbreak of Depression and yet, paradoxically, I have been able to function normally whilst visiting Anthony, looking after the new puppy, and interacting with friends and family. Ming is, of course, my priority, my favourite person, my rock but also, perhaps, my downfall in the sense that I feel I have failed him in so many ways.

There is a huge difference between Depression and being depressed; the former is a condition and the latter is a temporary mood. Obviously this is up for debate and I would appreciate feedback.

Dementia, on the other hand is, at least for Anthony, irreversible and ongoing/worsening. And yet he has the most amazing ability to comfort me, and to be so accepting when I leave him to ‘go to work’ (my latest ruse).

Me: I have to go to work. Will you be okay?

Anthony: Well, I’ll have to be, won’t I.

Me: So what would you rather have – me here with you or me making money?

Anthony: The money.

This has been a bit difficult to write so thanks for listening x

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Peafowl ‘prantics’!

Here is a link to a very short youtube of a guy in China using some sort of peafowl horn to call peas down from mountains. I definitely need to find this guy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iy_A3Tt8tcI

I looked online for one of these horn things but the one I thought would be good turned out to be an antique ornament and not a real one and, since then, I have given up because one of my blog friends suggested I imitate the call myself, so I have been doing that but now I’ve lost my voice!

Okay, so for anyone who needs a recap of the situation, it is mating season and a few of our adolescent peas are experiencing wanderlust and adventuring off  to forbidden territories (the neighbours’ roof). This has caused a fair bit of high drama:

Email from neighbours:

FOR SOME TIME NOW YOUR 3 PEACOCKS AND 20 ODD PEAHENS HAVE BEEN SPENDING MOST DAYS AND NIGHTS OVER HERE AND HAVE BEEN MAKING AN AWFUL MESS EVERYWHERE. THEY HAVE BEEN FLYING ON THE ROOF AND MESSING IN OUR DRINKING WATER. THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!

PLEASE CONTAIN THE BIRDS ON YOUR SIDE OF THE FARM. SURELY, IF YOU KEEP EXOTIC BIRDS YOU SHOULD LOOK AFTER THEM PROPERLY. UNLESS YOU WANT THEM IMPOUNDED BY THE RANGER, I SUGGEST YOU KEEP THEM PENNED.

My response:

Don’t stress. Except for King and Queenie (the adult couple), this is their first mating season, so they’re experiencing a bit of wanderlust. It won’t last long. We only have a total of 15 peafowl (12 blues and 3 whites), so I have no idea where the others are coming from. I feed ours at around 5pm and they roost in the wattle trees at the back every night.

A further comforting response from me:

I think all of the peafowl are back here now. If they return to your place again, simply point a hose at them and shoo them away in our direction. You can hose them off the roof or out of the tree this way. If you do this to a peahen, the peacock will follow … As I said in my previous email, this wanderlust is a seasonal thing and will not last. However the girls may be looking for nesting spots so you will need to persevere with the above methods. I’ve rung and left a message with two peafowl-savvy friends who will come and get them if the‘problem’ persists. Some of them may need to be re-homed.

So sorry but, again, this is a passing phase and I have spoken to the ranger and he’ll alert me if you alert him. Much better, though, if you simply ring me.

Email from neighbours:

CONSIDERATION IS THE OPERATIVE WORD!!! Your Peafowl are over here all the time and it has gone far enough! They are making such a mess (as Ming saw), the worst thing is that they have polluted our drinking water by defecating on the roof and everywhere else. Advice from the Ranger and the Shire (Clause 480 of the local Govt. Act) is that we are to give you 7 days notice to remove your birds or we will dispose of them ourselves, one way or the other. It is a week since we notified you of this problem and has made no difference.

My response:

I’ve come to the conclusion that you actually like fighting with people – so sad. I don’t understand why you are so angry and miserable; it must be exhausting. Ah yes, the frolicking peafowl: I will take the seven days notice as of today, and make some phone-calls. There is a waiting list for peafowl so it shouldn’t be a problem to re-home some of them. Have you tried hosing them away, as I suggested, or even shooting the gun into the air? The latter is bound to work …. As I said before, this is a passing phase, due to mating season, and may require a bit of latitude on your part. Do you not have a water filter for your tank?

……

Now obviously I have omitted names from the above cut/paste, but you get the gist. Since then (due to reports to the ranger and his emails to interested parties), I have had several people ringing me who want the peas and I have finally decided the guy up the road with a more isolated property, and with a great sense of humour, is the one who I will give a few males to. Now we just have to catch them!

I sat outside tonight, as usual, and did the bread ritual and I counted 12 peafowl zooming up into the trees, so 3 are missing and I guess they are on the neighbours’ roof again – argh! I got Ming to ring and leave a message that all is in hand now. But somehow I feel this drama isn’t over!

Prince: What the hell is going on now?

I think Julie is in trouble again

52 Comments »

The email worked!

The email I sent myself included the following suggestions. Here are my ‘answers’!

Get your act together.

I am not an actor.

You are doing fine.

No, I’m not.

Make a great meal.

I made chicken noodle soup from scratch last night – will that do?

Go for a walk.

I walked around the house and around the yard twice.

Forget about your NanoWriMo failed attempt – get back to your half-written novella.

I think I may have trashed that novella.

Make a list of things you need to do and put it on the frig.

The list needs several frigs.

Recharge your camera and start taking photos again!

I am still searching for the recharging thingy.

Get the paper work sorted into categories and do NOT panic.

I have found all of the paperwork and placed it neatly into a box.

Try to conjure something to look forward to.

Fame and fortune.

Stop being so hard on yourself.

I’m not!

Stop sulking.

Okay.

Practise smiling in front of the mirror.

This was a very good idea but I think I need one of my teeth capped.

Keep going.

I am, you idiot!

…………………………………

Is talking to yourself the first sign of madness?

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