jmgoyder

wings and things

“I’m gonna love you like I’m gonna lose you….”

There are many lines in this song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC8FsIdVi9Y that echo one of my many recurring dreams about Anthony and me.

When I last posted, I described a dream where Ants had miraculously recovered; now that is definitely a beautiful dream.

A less beautiful, recurring dream is the one about death. In this dream, Anthony is dead and my dream-self is grief-stricken. But then my real-self wakes up from the dream and realises that he is alive after all. Many of the lyrics of the this song really got to me and are as follows:

I found myself dreaming…
Split second and you disappeared…
Wake up in tears with you by my side…
Breath of relief when I realised…
Whenever we’re standing…
No, we’re not promised tomorrow

Ming of course is not at all keen on either listening to, or reading, the lyrics of this song and, now that he has become musically superior to me, he likes to throw me his opinions:

It’s soooo repetitive, Mum!
It’s so cliched – oh, Mum, you can’t possibly like this song!
NO I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR ROMANCE!
Yes, let’s have a chat about love … I like this girl who….
NO I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR HEARTBREAK!
I’m off to my shed now, Mum. Love you!

I think I might just listen to the song one more time before I go to bed because I don’t care what the Ming says, this has become my song for Anthony.

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This wrinkled soul

This soul has developed crinkles like the white linen shirts I used to wear but gave away because I hate ironing.

This soul has developed wrinkles – frown wrinkles – not very becoming at all.

This soul is like a boiled egg – perfect until you crack the shell, peel it off and mush the egg for a sandwich.

A splintered windscreen.

An improbable jigsaw.

This soul has also become argumentative and I am getting really sick of the way it nags, nags, nags; no wonder it has wrinkles.

No wonder it has crinkles.

I know I should probably try to iron out its crinkly wrinkles.

But that would be as stupid as ironing a Sebastopol goose.

I’ll try to make friends with this soul on my way into see Anthony in the nursing lodge.

His soul is much better behaved!

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