jmgoyder

wings and things

Perspective

on May 29, 2012

Last week, Son and I bought a box of chocolates for a girl in his music class whose mother was very sick. I dropped him off at music school and he had the box of chocolates, a little note he’d written, and roses he’d picked. He put it all in a plastic bag because he didn’t want to embarrass her, or himself. He was going to wait for a private moment (not easy at a music school).

But she wasn’t there that day because her mother had died. When I found out, I wept for this daughter and mother who I don’t know, and my sorrow seemed somehow presumptuous.

The roses went into the rubbish and the chocolates into the refrigerator.

I just dropped Son off at music school so he can accompany the rest of the class to the funeral this morning.

Perspective.


40 responses to “Perspective

  1. Oh Julie, I’m so sorry to hear this. But you must be so proud of Son who seems to have inherited his mother’s kindness. My thoughts are with you all.

  2. camsgranny says:

    I’m sorry for son, and for the daughter, life is very fragile and sometimes, we tend to forget this.

  3. Robyn Lee says:

    So heartbreaking. Such a sweet and loving gesture for your son to bring the gifts for his classmate. Perspective – yes. A good friend of mine (we birthed and raised our babies together etc.) is struggling for her life as I write. Her cancer (melanoma) has metastasized and invaded brain and lungs ~ causing a stroke, paralyzing half of her etc. Knocked me over… I need to spend time with her, and have had such issues myself I have not been by her side as I want to … perspective…. xo

  4. Oh wow. Poor girl! That was so kind of your son to try to be there for her, though!

  5. Even when it’s expected, death catches us by surprise. I’m very sorry for the poor girl and her mother. Must have been a shock for your son too.

  6. I feel badly for your son too–how thoughtful, and how awful for him to find out his gift could not be accepted.

  7. terry1954 says:

    that is so sad, but i commend u for supporting your son, even when u didn’t know the girl or the mother. you are a great mom!

  8. Dislike (the sad story, not your post). That was very kind and thoughtful of your son and it’s too bad he didn’t get a chance to deliver his gifts as planned.

  9. My thoughts are with you all. Such hard times and hard lessons for ones so young. What a kind soul your son is. But his timing will end up being right – I trust in that. xx

  10. Tilly Bud says:

    How dreadfully sad. The loss of a parent is always hard, but more so, the younger we are.

  11. bluebee says:

    What a lovely human being yoU and Anthony have raised, Julie

  12. The force and nature of llfe .So much for a young hearts to have to deal with. And death. Sometimes it must be so overwhelming. My wish for son’s friend is that she know you too Jules. I wish she could spend some time with you & son on the farm. Wishing so hard that she could be privy to your perspectives on the nature of life & death . Spend some time healing with you on the farm, that would be my wish for this girl you do not even know.

  13. niasunset says:

    I am so sad to hear this dear Julie, my thoughts with you both, your son, he is such a nice young man, but I know his mother so nice too. R.I.P. her mother, and prayers for this young lady. Love, nia

  14. TBM says:

    That is sad…my heart goes out to the family.

  15. Paws To Talk says:

    http://pawstotalk.net/2012/05/29/bella-and-didi-the-standard-poodles-thank-you/

    We have awarded you the One Lovely Blog Award. Please enjoy.

    Bella and DiDi

  16. Judith Post says:

    I haven’t been on the computer much over Memorial Day holiday. House full of guests. A full and wonderful, long weekend. Sorry yours wasn’t as much fun. But glad you can laugh about a snake. My daughter had a pet garter snake that we all fell in love with. Who knew?

  17. […] Perspective (jmgoyder.com) […]

  18. magicallymad says:

    What an empathetic doll you have raised. Sorry for a loss so close to home. Big hugs!!!

  19. janechese says:

    So sad but to hear of the loss but I am glad that son is going to make the gesture again- the young woman needs a kind heart like his. Really tells me to take the moment while it is here.

  20. 2me4art says:

    Hi, you are so wonderful that I nominated you for another award, if you already have it or don’t wish to claim it, its ok. http://foodstoriesblog.com/illuminating-blogger-award/

  21. shoreacres says:

    Once, I had a professor who was more important to me than he knew. I kept thinking, “I should tell him…” but of course I didn’t. Until one day, I picked up the telephone and called, only to reach one of his daughters who said, “He just died today, here at home.”

    So. We learn our lessons. We’re not in control, things happen, we shouldn’t put things off and the biggest one of all – you never know.

    The beauty of life is that healing’s at its heart. Bodies can heal, and hearts can heal, but even when bodies don’t heal, our hearts will, given time and love.

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