Last week, Son and I bought a box of chocolates for a girl in his music class whose mother was very sick. I dropped him off at music school and he had the box of chocolates, a little note he’d written, and roses he’d picked. He put it all in a plastic bag because he didn’t want to embarrass her, or himself. He was going to wait for a private moment (not easy at a music school).
But she wasn’t there that day because her mother had died. When I found out, I wept for this daughter and mother who I don’t know, and my sorrow seemed somehow presumptuous.
The roses went into the rubbish and the chocolates into the refrigerator.
I just dropped Son off at music school so he can accompany the rest of the class to the funeral this morning.
Perspective.
jmgoyder 
Oh Julie, I’m so sorry to hear this. But you must be so proud of Son who seems to have inherited his mother’s kindness. My thoughts are with you all.
Thanks Diana – big shock. Jx
I’m sorry for son, and for the daughter, life is very fragile and sometimes, we tend to forget this.
Yes, you are so right about that fragility – so right!
So heartbreaking. Such a sweet and loving gesture for your son to bring the gifts for his classmate. Perspective – yes. A good friend of mine (we birthed and raised our babies together etc.) is struggling for her life as I write. Her cancer (melanoma) has metastasized and invaded brain and lungs ~ causing a stroke, paralyzing half of her etc. Knocked me over… I need to spend time with her, and have had such issues myself I have not been by her side as I want to … perspective…. xo
So sorry to hear about your friend, Robyn – terrible. Juliex
Oh wow. Poor girl! That was so kind of your son to try to be there for her, though!
Yeah, I was quite shocked to hear this terribly sad news.
Even when it’s expected, death catches us by surprise. I’m very sorry for the poor girl and her mother. Must have been a shock for your son too.
Big shock. Thank you anneli!
I feel badly for your son too–how thoughtful, and how awful for him to find out his gift could not be accepted.
The funeral will be underway by now – hopefully next week Son can try again with his gesture. Thanks for your comment and interest! Jx
that is so sad, but i commend u for supporting your son, even when u didn’t know the girl or the mother. you are a great mom!
He is a good kid – all his idea.
well look at his mom! he had a good upbringing
Dislike (the sad story, not your post). That was very kind and thoughtful of your son and it’s too bad he didn’t get a chance to deliver his gifts as planned.
He is going to make the gesture next week now – thanks PM!
My thoughts are with you all. Such hard times and hard lessons for ones so young. What a kind soul your son is. But his timing will end up being right – I trust in that. xx
So sad.
How dreadfully sad. The loss of a parent is always hard, but more so, the younger we are.
What a lovely human being yoU and Anthony have raised, Julie
Mostly – hehe!
The force and nature of llfe .So much for a young hearts to have to deal with. And death. Sometimes it must be so overwhelming. My wish for son’s friend is that she know you too Jules. I wish she could spend some time with you & son on the farm. Wishing so hard that she could be privy to your perspectives on the nature of life & death . Spend some time healing with you on the farm, that would be my wish for this girl you do not even know.
I would love to get to know this lovely girl so hopefully soon….
I am so sad to hear this dear Julie, my thoughts with you both, your son, he is such a nice young man, but I know his mother so nice too. R.I.P. her mother, and prayers for this young lady. Love, nia
I don’t know this girl but I have seen her – it was a sad day and many thanks, nia!
That is sad…my heart goes out to the family.
Many thanks TBM
http://pawstotalk.net/2012/05/29/bella-and-didi-the-standard-poodles-thank-you/
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Bella and DiDi
I haven’t been on the computer much over Memorial Day holiday. House full of guests. A full and wonderful, long weekend. Sorry yours wasn’t as much fun. But glad you can laugh about a snake. My daughter had a pet garter snake that we all fell in love with. Who knew?
I had to trash that snake post – sorry!
[…] Perspective (jmgoyder.com) […]
What an empathetic doll you have raised. Sorry for a loss so close to home. Big hugs!!!
Yes, he’s not bad (most of the time!)
So sad but to hear of the loss but I am glad that son is going to make the gesture again- the young woman needs a kind heart like his. Really tells me to take the moment while it is here.
Hi, you are so wonderful that I nominated you for another award, if you already have it or don’t wish to claim it, its ok. http://foodstoriesblog.com/illuminating-blogger-award/
Once, I had a professor who was more important to me than he knew. I kept thinking, “I should tell him…” but of course I didn’t. Until one day, I picked up the telephone and called, only to reach one of his daughters who said, “He just died today, here at home.”
So. We learn our lessons. We’re not in control, things happen, we shouldn’t put things off and the biggest one of all – you never know.
The beauty of life is that healing’s at its heart. Bodies can heal, and hearts can heal, but even when bodies don’t heal, our hearts will, given time and love.
Hearbreaking.
Sigh…
So sad.
Very sad…