jmgoyder

wings and things

Why wait?

I have been so excited about my idea for a Christmas present for Ming who has become so musical over the last few years and is now doing his Certificate 4 in music.

So anyway, he started volunteering at a local school called Djidi djidi Aboriginal school a few weeks ago. Coincidentally, he had become a great fan of Xavier Rudd’s music.

So my brilliant idea was to get Ming a didgeridoo for Christmas. I got it today and have hidden it so I can give it to him later this afternoon. Why wait!

Sneak peak:

Oh I love surprises! Ming knows he is getting a present but he has no idea what it is so I said if he helps me feed the birds and put them away, he will then have to sit at our picnic table and close his eyes until I say ‘okay’!

Excitement makes me a bit incoherent – ha!

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Spot the difference

Here are two photographs (I concede that these are not very good photographs but that isn’t the point of this game). Okay, so you know those newspaper games where there are two pictures that, at first glance, look identical and you have to find the differences? Well, here are two photos that are different from each other in numerous ways but there is only one significant difference. Can you find it?

 

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Love story 90 – My camellia tree

I think we have over 20 camellia trees here – it is too rainy for me to go out and count them so it’s on my long list of ‘things to do’. Anthony planted most of them when he and his mother and brother first came here (he was 21 I think so it was before I was born and that’s why I don’t necessarily know all the details).

After we got married, he started planting more – I’m not quite sure why and, not being the least bit interested in gardening, I didn’t take much notice. But one day, on one of his rare days off from milking the cows, Anthony coaxed me to hop in the ute and drive one hour north to a camellia nursery called Heavenly Gardens. Booooooring, I thought, as I strapped little toddler Ming into his car seat, but I resigned myself.

When we got there, we were greeted by the owner, an ancient looking woman, almost bent double with a back condition, like an upside down L. She and one of the men who worked there, showed us through forests of camellias while I tried to allay my own boredom by allaying Ming’s. Then, all of a sudden, I saw it, a tree in full flower, each one like a ballerina. It was nothing like any of the camellias we had at home; it was much more beautiful and it was really unusual. My interest sparked, I inquired about it but the elderly woman said it was the only one she had, it was very rare and it was definitely not for sale. Her off-sider pointed out to me that it was planted in the ground and well established so there was no way she would sell it to me.

It came time for morning tea and the elderly woman and her off-sider welcomed us into a shed to share tea and cake and we sat down together while Ming vroomed around the shed with a pretend car. I said to the elderly woman that I was not a gardener but I really loved the tree and, with a twinkle in her eye, she told me that the boys would have to dig it out of the ground, and that she really didn’t want to sell it. “I wouldn’t take anything less than $350,” she murmured, looking into the distance nonchalantly.

“It’s a deal!” I exclaimed. Anthony, who was sitting next to me, had overheard this little exchange and pinched me on the bum, whispering, “Are you crazy? It’s only worth $50 at most. Nobody pays $350 for a camellia.”

But already, the elderly woman had somehow signalled her troops and three men, including her off-sider (who later told us he was a nephew), were walking away from the shed with shovels in their hands. My heart did a grin flip! I pulled my money out of my back pocket and gave it to the elderly woman who smiled softly at me. Anthony sighed and hurried down to fetch the ute. Then he helped the men load the tree on and I shook hands with nephew who told us to drive out and around the side of the nursery. He had a mysterious expression on his face.

Well, we drove around and he loaded three more potted camellias onto the ute. They weren’t the same as my tree but they were still lovely. The nephew said, “The old girl really ripped you off, so this is to make up for it. She won’t know.”

Not long after, we heard that the elderly woman had died and that Heavenly Gardens had closed down. By this time Anthony had planted my tree for me and look at it now – 16 years later!

I am going to pick some now and take them into Anthony at the nursing lodge.

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Smiling isn’t simple

In advanced stages of Parkinson’s Disease, the facial muscles stop working properly. This is why Anthony’s face sometimes resembles a mask in its expressionlessness. As facial expressions are one of the main ways in which we humans both show and ‘read’ emotions, a blank face can make things very difficult.

For Anthony, smiling isn’t simple. Out of all of the PD symptoms, I find this one of the hardest to deal with because I miss him smiling at me. An expressionless face looks decidedly unfriendly and miserable and (selfishly, I guess) I want him to not only smile, but to laugh the way he used to – loud and long and with his face all crinkled up.

Extreme antics – like Ming monkeying around – can produce an Anthony smile and sometimes, if I exaggerate an anecdote or laugh at my own joke, I will get an Anthony smile. But mostly, no – no smile.

Yesterday I had the wheelchair taxi bring Ants to his nephew’s place not far from our farm. It was there that I discovered a small mirthy miracle in the form of a beautiful baby, Anthony’s great-niece.

Thank you, beautiful baby girl, for making Anthony smile!

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Thank you, Nia!

As many of you know, Nia, who lives in Turkey, and who I only know via the blogosphere, handmade me four pillow covers and posted them to me a little while ago – a gift! I found some filling and took one in for Anthony at the nursing lodge. Today I finally remembered to take a couple of pictures of it.

I have bought Nia four little Australian things which, as soon as I have found where I put them, I will post off to her to say thank you.  Here is her site but I realize many of you already know this wonderful woman.

http://photographyofnia.com/

Anthony loves the pillow, but said, a bit sadly, “It’s too good to be in here.”

“But you’re here,” I said.

“I know,” he said, stroking Nia’s pillow gently.

“Stop this nonsense,” I said, picking up the pillow and smacking him lightly on the head with it.

He actually smiled!

Thank you, Nia.

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Golden Valley update

Yesterday, two women from the Balingup Historical Society came to visit Anthony in the nursing lodge. The first photo is of Helen with Anthony and the second is of Carol with Anthony. It took me an incredibly long time to achieve the bad lighting in the first picture and the blurriness in the second – ha! Oh well at least I have a bit of a record of what was a couple of hours of pure pleasure.

Together, we established that, in amongst that massive box of photos, there were sixteen of Golden Valley from when Anthony was a boy. Unfortunately he isn’t in any of these photos but some of the trees he planted are. It was the loveliest visit, with lots of laughs as Anthony kept referring to his first girlfriend who still lives in Balingup.

Each and every photo provoked a little story, memory, date and it was such a fantastic experience for me/us to meet these two dedicated woman who are so keen to preserve this history. If I wore a hat, I would take it off for them.

Thankyou, Carol and Helen for making Anthony’s day unforgettable!

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History in the making?

Background: Oldest dairy in Western Australia.

Foreground: Youngest beard in Western Australia.

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Nag, nag, nag

Would you PLEASE wipe your boots before coming in! Oh look at this mess and I’ve just vaccuumed.

Will you ever remember to put your dirty dishes on the sink instead of leaving them on the table?

Do NOT feed the dogs in the morning. How many times do I have to tell you? Look how fat they’re getting!

You keep rebelling against me and it causes these catastrophes between us.

Our communication problem wouldn’t exist if you didn’t keep on breaking the rules.

There will be no more eating or drinking in the car – do you understand?

Look at your room! It’s appalling. When are you going to sort yourself out?

It’s about time you got OFF your bum and away from that computer don’t you think!

Do you understand the meaning of teamwork or do I have to explain it to you all over again?

If you ate proper meals, you would not have this disgusting midnight snack habit.

All of the above have been uttered by Ming to me.

Out of the mouths of babes ……!!!!!

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Secretomotor skills

I have done too much crying lately so I decided to google ‘crying’ and I discovered this new word, ‘secretomotor’ which I rather like because (if I am spelling it correctly) it implies that I have a very special and secret (?) talent for it. In other words, I do crying very well. If I were to be assessed on my crying ability I would be given very good grades for this weekend’s attempts because I developed my whimpery, watery, wimpy secretions into a rather horrific howl. I did this in front of Ming first, then in front of a good friend, then today I performed for Anthony’s taxi driver who was so impressed he let me wipe my face on his shoulder. I am hoping he has some contacts who will turn my weeping into a wholesale business of wonderfully weary weirdness. I do believe I now have the key to a new reality show; after all, sorrow sells, especially when it is secretomotorish.

Today, the nursing lodge forgot to  put Ants into a wheelchair to transport him home in the wheelchair taxi; then the taxi service forgot to pick Ming up from town as well so the driver had to go all the way back into town to get him. In the meantime our visitors arrived – a mother and daughter; the daughter is going to have scoliosis surgery early next year, so wanted to talk to Ming. The taxi driver got Ming back home for another fee then said he would be back later to take Ants back to the nursing lodge. By this time my crying was all curled up inside my stomach but I managed to cope even though Ants was giving me the shark eye look. My mother, who had brought our visitors, made coffee and tea for everyone and we shared our guests’ pastries.

My crying gradually became a clenched fist behind my laughter and my sunglasses and I wondered, in amongst the conversation, if I should just give up on Anthony or keep my arm around his shoulders. His silence out in the sunny garden made my eardrums thrum with that slow, quiet heartbeat of nothingness, so, pretending that all was fine, I saw our guests and my mother off, watched Ming motorbike off to milk the cows and helped the taxi driver get Ants into a seat. I kissed my husband goodbye until tomorrow, stepped out of the taxi van, paid the driver the bill and then, with no warning, I began to cry and the taxi driver gave me his sleeve to wipe my nose on.

Secretomotor skills have become my speciality lately but soon I will replace these with sunflowers.

Tomorrow is still three and a half hours away.

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The stolen gramophone

For some reason, I have woken up in the middle of the night for the last few nights, boiling with anger against the person who stole Anthony’s portable gramophone.

I’m not sure why I am now so angry when the disappearence of the gramophone happened nearly two years ago.

Anthony, toddler Ming and I bought this gramophone from an antique dealer years ago and it is one of the many things that has enlivened our lives, and entertained visitors over and over and over again. It came with lots of old records and we used to bring it out to the front veranda and entertain people.

But, one day, it disappeared.

I vividly remember us showing it to one of the numerous agency employees who would come once a fortnight to either clean or cook or keep Ants company while I was at work and Ming was at school. Well, she absolutely loved that gramophone and wanted one just like it.

One day, I had to take Ants to the doctor’s and, as it never occurred to me not to trust this agency employee, I just told her not to bother locking the house as we would be back soon. She then told me it was her last day of working for the agency because she was resigning, so I just gave her a bit of a hug and said thank you.

And we never saw that gramophone again.

I have decided to find another one soon so that I can take it into the nursing lodge.

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