wings and things

Photographs with Anthony

on November 17, 2015

Yesterday, two of Anthony’s nieces visited us at the nursing home.


It’s only lately that I have realised how important it is to take photos of Anthony with the various friends and relatives who visit. I’m astounded that I haven’t taken more photos of Ants with Ming, with my mother (who often visits him on my behalf), the regular visitors, occasional visitors, the wonderful carers!

My reluctance to take photos is partly to do with people’s privacy; partly to do with savouring the moments rather than trying to capture them on camera; but mostly because I don’t want to post photos of Anthony that are unflattering. After all, he was always rather vain about his appearance. When I showed him the photo I posted a couple of days ago (of him and me), he remarked, “Who is the old idiot?”

If it weren’t for the nieces yesterday, I would never have realised how important these photographs are. I will now coerce the staff to take heaps and heaps of photos of us! My camera is on charge.

Today, I stayed home for a break, and my amazing mother visited Ants and rang me from his room.

Meg: Here he is, darling.
Me: Ants?
Anthony: Hi Jules.
Me: What do you want for tea?
Anthony: Some hot, hot …
Me: Pies?
Anthony: Not ….
Me: What about crayfish or prawns?
Anthony: Save for tomorrow.
Meg: He is fine, darling. Are you?
Me: Yes and thank you, Mama!

Of course the above is a compressed version of a dialogue filled with pauses, and impossible to capture via photography.

But I have decided to ask the various staff members who have become my friends to take photos of Anthony and me.

22 responses to “Photographs with Anthony

  1. ksbeth says:

    i love the conversations so much –

  2. Colline says:

    Photos are always good to look back on memories and the people we have had in our lives.

  3. Rhonda says:

    The photo is a beautiful one of the three of them…amazing how much of Ming is seen in Anthony in this one Jules…and his face is also showing his youth here. Well done Mrs Photographer! I love how Meg calls you darling. I don’t know why, but this country doesn’t use that endearment one tenth of how you all do (and the Brits of course) and it’s a shame. When I hear it spoken, or see it written, as above, it warms my heart. It’s odd maybe, but it’s one of those words that expresses love and warmth so much better than sweetheart, or honey. Give your darling self a hug from me okay? xoxoxo

  4. Judy says:

    Another benefit is that you will have many pictures to treasure in the years to come. Beautiful idea!

  5. susanpoozan says:

    Lots of photographs sounds an excellent idea.

  6. Like Beth, I enjoy the sharing of the conversations. And now the pictures!!!! 🙂

  7. Vicki says:

    Great idea.

    “Photos capture a moment in time to view for Eternity” used to be on my old blog header.

  8. Wonderful and yes do take more photos – and print them!! c

  9. Lynda says:

    I am loving all your photographs in your most recent posts, Julie. They are so beautiful. YOU are so beautiful. I also think putting some of them into a photo album would be wonderful for Anthony to look at when you or his other family and friends aren’t there.

  10. Judith Post says:

    Anthony is a lucky man. When I used to visit John’s mom in the nursing center, there were SO many residents who never got any visits from anyone. I felt so sorry for them. Anthony knows how much he’s loved. You and your families make sure he does. It’s wonderful.

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