Wings | jmgoyder

Good things 1

by jmgoyder

A pianist in our paddock (yes, I know I posted this photo previously but for some reason the comments went off automatically).

Last beautiful picture of Anthony with Doc (who died several weeks ago). Jack in the forefront, who I have re-named ‘Jumping Jack’ because he jumps like a kangaroo, will outlive all of us I think!

How to make a Harley Davidson motorbike cake ….

My good friend, the madcakelady herself, on the left, and me.

A son, sitting on the best surprise Christmas present ever! (Anthony is in the background).

Anthony’s pride and joy, the Aga – the hub of this house.

A scoliosis surgery success story.

Love.

Animal Family Friendship Wings

38 Comments »

Platitudes and cliches

by jmgoyder

Platitudes make me puke; cliches catch at the corners of my eyes like rogue eyelashes.

Too much ~~crap~~ stuff is repeated, disseminated and shared until it’s like the worn out elastic that actually stinks when you finally pull it out of some old piece of clothing.

For example:

She’ll be right, mate!

Tomorrow is a better day.

Patience is a virtue.

God doesn’t give you any more than you can endure.

The grass is greener.

The grass isn’t always greener.

Chin up!

You will be rewarded in Heaven.

Suffering is good for the soul.

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.

Smell the roses.

On the wings of a snow white dove ….

I would much rather read something like this:

Patrick Overton reflects in his poem “Faith”:

When you come to the edge of all the light you have

And take the first step into the darkness of the unknown,

You must believe one of two things will happen:

There will be something solid for you to stand upon,

or you will be taught how to fly.

The only thing he forgot to mention was that there is actually a third possibility:

You ~~will~~ might fall.

Family Friendship LOVE STORY Wings

61 Comments »

Unbearable

by jmgoyder

I keep trying to keep trying to keep trying – to be funny, to be positive and all that – but sometimes there is just no point in trying to keep trying when it’s all downhill anyway.

Parkinson’s disease is an absolute shit of a disease; it sucks all of the joy out so that the laughing stuff is knifey, cynical, brave but hopeless.

When I went to pick Anthony up today, I hoisted him up off his chair but then somehow lost him and he slid to the ground. I had to get a nurse to help me pick him up and for the rest of the day (we went to my mother’s for lunch) he kept saying I made him fall in a half-jokey way – barbed wire.

By the time we’d had lunch at my ma’s, seen Arthur, and gone back to Anthony’s nursing lodge, I was ready to fight someone, anyone, but there was nobody to fight. So I just drove home to the farm, thinking about my conversation with Anthony in which I said, “I haven’t abandoned you – you have abandoned me!”

Apparently you are not supposed to ask why? You are supposed to ask what? Well, as far as I’m concerned, the what can get over itself because it is the why that makes my heart beat so thunderously.

Why does this Anthony, pictured only 18 months ago, not resemble the Anthony I see now? Why?

Unbearable.

Family LOVE STORY Wings

68 Comments »

Luxury holiday!

by jmgoyder

Anthony and I visited Arthur today in the hostel where he has temporarily been placed.

We wanted to see if he was okay and we were both relieved to find that he was much more than okay; he thought he had died and gone to heaven! Not really, of course, but for this decrepit old man to move from a decrepit old hut to a nice warm room with lots of friendly people, lots of regular meals and attentive carers is like, in his words, “a luxury holiday!”

Arthur doesn’t seem to miss Tina Turner at all! I can’t imagine why….

Friendship Wings

27 Comments »

‘What about me?’

by jmgoyder

Bubble: It’s not fair. She always forgets about me and I was here long before that show-off, Baby Turkey.

Zaruma: I hear you, bro – I was hurt to be left out of that ‘I thought this was a bird blog’ post too. Julie seems to have forgotten that we were here first.

Bubble: Well, not technically, Zaruma. Perhaps I should have told you this earlier but you and I are actually named after the original Bubble and Zaruma.

Zaruma: Yeah, I’ve heard about those guys.

Bubble: They were heroes.

Zaruma: What happened to them?

Bubble: It was terrible. The first Bubble got bitten by that rotten dog and the first Zaruma died in his sleep. Julie and Ming cried and cried.

Zaruma: Wow, I didn’t know.

Bubble: There’s a lot you don’t know.

Wings

30 Comments »

Angels humming?

by jmgoyder

When I was eight, I went away to a friend’s parents’ lake cottage for two weeks and was so homesick that I found everything beyond the first day unbearable.

On the long trip home, I looked out of the car window as the trees rushed past and all of a sudden I thought I heard angels humming. I don’t know/will never know if this was imagination, wishful thinking, my prayers, or real angels singing just to me, but it sustained me until I was delivered back to my family.

Today, I thought I heard exactly the same sound and, since I wasn’t having such a good day, I embraced the sound, amazed!

It wasn’t until the humming angels became rather loud that I discovered I had left the door of the refrigerator open and it was the alarm.

Wings

58 Comments »

‘I thought this was a bird blog!’

by jmgoyder

Angelina: It’s a bird blog primarily, of course, but Julie keeps going off topic.

Queenie: I’ve noticed that. She keeps blogging about silly old men!

King: Like me?

Queenie: Darling, never – your tail feathers will grow back soon!

Baby Turkey: I have now held this pose for several hours but Julie still hasn’t noticed!

Diamond: Me too.

Guinneas: I’m sure she’ll get back on topic soon. We always do.

Phoenix 1: She hasn’t taken much notice of me lately either, which is a bit hurtful.

Godfrey: I suggest we all start biting her. Watch and learn.

Emery 2: Noooooooooooooo!

Tina Turner: Yes – Godfrey is right!

Wings

47 Comments »

A better life?

by jmgoyder

Today has been eventful.

A lovely place has been found for Arthur (see previous post) and he will be leaving in a day or so. Ming (Son) has told him the hut is no longer safe and we have to have it inspected for wiring (which we do).

One of the guinnea fowl was cowering in the corner of the emus’ lean-to, so Ming helped her get out. I think she wants somewhere safe to lay eggs, so here we go again!

Ming and I went out for lunch despite suffering from gastro. We had to go because it was a promise we made yesterday when we had our long discussion. I had chilli prawns and now feel amazingly better!

Anthony got angry on the phone this morning (first time ever) and said he was hurt (first time ever) that he couldn’t come home for the night so I have arranged to pick him up for the day tomorrow. His uncharacteristic upsetness has cast a shadow on today, but tomorrow will be better.

I have nearly caught up with the washing and folding of clothes.

Ming is a happy chappy.

I am too but I seem to have this spare water balloon full of tears that keeps landing in front of me, making me afraid to smile, or take the next step.

Ming said he read the post about him on Facebook and hated it but then he grinned.

One of my two PhD students has finished and submitted his thesis.

Anthony just asked me on the phone (I ring him several times a day when I can’t get in to see him) if I still loved him and I said yes.

During lunch, Ming said we were not to talk about Anthony so we didn’t.

The ute is making a funny sound.

I had a dream last night that I was having an argument with someone and a hippopotamus squashed her.

The main car’s side mirrors are smashed and I still haven’t rung the insurance company.

Nearly all of the young peacocks now have long feathers.

Wild galahs and 28s are everywhere.

There is a rat in the washhouse which only Ming has seen, so I need his company to do the washing.

I have a mother who is a best friend.

The electricity has not gone off now for a couple of days.